April Update

 Dear readers,

I hope that life is treating you all well and that you are stiff with anticipation for the next recollection of another sexy adventure in my dirty little massage emporium of perversity and lust. I often wonder what you call a collection of perverts, a perversity of perverts perhaps? 

I have two snippets of bad news to relate sadly. 

Firstly, I have been unwell for a few days with my stomach. My regular clients know that I had to undergo major stomach surgery some 25 years ago. Well, my stomach has been playing up recently and I have to go for some biopsies. So I am having a few days off but should be back, stiff and ready for more adventures by next Wednesday, 3rd May. In the meantime I am still available for wank chat and my regulars are welcome to call and if I can I will of course indulge you with my infamous massage experience. In 20years in this business I have never taken time off because of my health, so this is a novel experience for me. 

Secondly when you visit you will notice that I have a for sale sign outside of the house. I am moving, or hope to move. How long this will take who knows. I have lived in my present home for 20 years but being a country lad at heart and now that I am not tied into travelling to London and Manchester on business every month, I dream of being surrounded by sheep and horses again and no cars or neighbours. I have not come to a decision yet on whither I will carry on working or retiring or semi retiring. I do not intend travelling too far away from Newcastle, so no need to panic that I am disappearing to the Outer Hebrides. 

Readers of this blog who have been putting off visiting should however take the plunge over the next few months and visit, just in case I do retire or decide to restrict my appointments to established clients only.

Other than being unwell for a few weeks, April has been very busy with a few new clients. It is always nice to meet new clients. Clients are naturally often a little nervous when they visit for the first time and of course I am as well. I want my clients to have a fabulous time but I am always a little nervous about how raunchy they expect me to be. I try to let the client set the pace, because for some it is the first time they have had a sexual encounter with a man and touching a hard cock can be daunting, even intimidating. I have known clients shake with nerves and others be so excited they come as soon as I touch their arse, which sort of spoils the appointment if they have booked for an hour and they orgasm in the first 10 minutes.  

Every person has their peculiar sexual likes and dislikes. Some guys are just fascinated by cocks and only want their cock played with, others like there arsehole played with or their balls, some like to have their nipples bitten and sucked and stroked and teased. I personally am an arsehole man, I love my arsehole being played with, rimmed and fingered. I would rather a client stroked my arsehole than suck my cock, especially if they want me or come during an appointment. A good appointment should be about discovering what excites the client, what they like and do not like.  

One new client, a mature gentleman, booked an appointment a couple of weeks ago and he was delighted to experience for the first time the joy of rimming and having his puckered hole stroked and teased. The appointment began as always on the massage table and my massaging warm oil over his back and then between his arse-cheeks. I soon had him moaning in pleasure and before long his arse was in the air and I was running my fingers down the crack of his arse, stroking his puckered anus and cupping his balls which I began to pull gently while stroking his hard cock, pushing my hand between his legs. He soon moaned for me to stop because he was near coming. As he slipped off the massage table to go through to the bedroom, I could not resist falling to my knees and worshipping his round wrinkled arsehole which twitched as I drove my tongue deep between the puckered ring, entering his wet and twitching anus. "I have dream't of this so often", he muttered, "and now it is happening its just incredible" as he pushed his arsehole with increased gusto and passion onto my hard, probing tongue.

After a little more rimming we made our way through to the bedroom and I hopped onto the bed on my knee's. presenting my arse-ring  for his inspection. He began to stroke me gently with his fingers that he had wet with his spittle. I sensed him struggling with the idea of taking the plunge and tonguing my dirty little hole. He did not think about it for too long however because I suddenly felt his hard tongue running around the rim of my anus. The sensation was delicious, especially when he started to milk my cock while sucking on my arsehole.After five or ten minutes of delicious tongue action he stood and presented his hard cock to my anus and began to rub pre-cum soaked knob end over my greedy little arsehole which twitched in anticipation of being fucked. Regular readers will remember I wrote a post on rimming with your knob, and he had obviously read the blog post and was joyfully living the fantasy. I kept murmuring, "fuck my arsehole, shoot that spunk over my arse and then piss over my dirty shit hole to wash your spunk off my arse". I was lost in lust and he was very much enjoying himself. "Do it to me". he begged. So changing positions I began to massage his arsehole with my knob end, dribbling pre-cum over his bum hole and watching it dribble over his balls. I was getting so close to coming and told him I would shoot my load if he was ready. He had other plans and changing position he had me kneel over him and inserting his finger deep into my anus I wanked myself off over his face. Opening his mouth he greedily used his tongue to lick the spunk off of my ejaculating knob and into his mouth. Laying back, his face covered in  my spunk, that glistened in white thick globules on his chin, he wanked himself furiously. Kneeling between his legs I inserted a couple of fingers into his arsehole, stretching the ring while sucking on his balls. Before long he let out a long, low moan that lasted it seems for ages as he fired copious amounts of sperm into my mouth and over his tummy. 

When he had finished a strange silence descended while we both recovered our strength. We had both experienced an especially intense orgasm and he, it seemed, was experiencing a sexual bliss that he had not had for a long time. I think he murmured something about it being like his first time. I presumed the first time he had wanked, but I didn't enquire because it was very obvious that he was leaving a very happy client.

I hope that you have enjoyed this dirty little memory. Please comment if you enjoyed the blog and please read the book My Dirty Memoirs" because it is all true and all my adventures are recounted with the intention of arousing you interest. I also have a new book being released very soon, yet another erotic adventure but this time set in victorian London. Details will be released soon.

Do give me a call if you want to book a one to one appointment or a dirty wank chat, Take care and hope to see you soon. 

Call me on 07517 697569 

WHAT TO DO WITH MY BLOG .

 This is a very short post. 

I have been wondering recently what to do with my blog. Do I keep it as it is or shall I develop it into more of a dirty story blog to help sell my erotic writing or shall I go more into the politics of the job itself and talk more about being a sex worker and about clients etc. I would love some feed back on what you, my readers would like to read. My clients are the reason that I exist and I aim to please. 

I am thinking about releasing my new book in 3 stages and charging £1.99 for each edition of chapters. They are all very erotic and guaranteed two wanks minimum per chapter. Do you all think that this would be a good idea. I am sure sales would prompt me to write quicker and devote more energy to the project. Would you be willing to purchase special addition copies, which would be more expensive or perhaps clients may like to buy disks with the stories on or have files with chapters sent direct to them on receipt of monies. Please let me know your thoughts.

Please reply in comments or text if that is easier etc.

Call Chris to book a wank chat or massage appointment on 07517697569 

chris. 

MARCH HAS BEEN AMUSING

H, readers, I hope that everyone is well and despite all the gloom and doom as horny as ever. March has just been one of those months. After a very busy December, January and February things have been a little on the quiet side, although if I am honest, my availability has been limited because I have had lots going on privately to keep my busy. What has filled me with glee however has been the abusive texts from a competitor, my blog being reported to blogger and a nasty email from someone transitioning who accused me of transphobia I think and not knowing my gay history. It is pure joy this business NOT:)..

The nasty tweets accusing me of being stuck up etc simply confirmed why I avoid all contact with others in this business. I love sex work and I have campaigned for many years for decriminalisation, but sadly I also have learned the hard way to avoid others in this business and reporting posts on my blog (for the 2nd time) was just a bit pointless because they just put the post behind an adult only block which the whole blog is behind anyway, so pointless waste of their time. The nasty email was just a tad weird. I simply state in my do's and don't's that I do not see cross dressers which is a kink where some men like to dress in women's clothes, especially lingerie. It is a kink that does not turn me on and so if the person booking is in to cross dressing then there are escorts who cater specifically for that kink and they would be better seeing someone who is sexually excited by that scenario. I do not totally exclude genuine transexuals and have massaged and entertained women transitioning to men and men transitioning to women. I have zero problems with transexuals. We live in weird times however where the extreme trans lobby look to find offence when none is intended.  I did once have a booking where the client turned up in a skirt and high heels and was witnessed by my neighbours.  This totally horrified me as I live in a nice discreet area and do not bring attention to myself.

On brighter note, I should have more availability in April and of course I am free to entertain over the telephone with my ever popular wank chat service until around 9pm most evenings. Give me a call if you are feeling horny. My number for both wank chat and to book one to one appointments is 07517 697569.

In what little spare time I have had I have been working on my new erotic novel which is edging toward completion. I have also had one exciting encounter which I am sure that you will all enjoy reading about.

A new client arrived and as usual was a little nervous having never done "anything like this before" to quote his exact words. After his shower he was soon on the table and ready for my hands to explore his firms body. He had lovely rounded buttocks and low hanging balls which always turn me on. I have a thing about big dangling balls, not so much big cocks. 

My fingers stroked down over his puckered hole and I heard him moan with pleasure and it was not long before he had his arse in the air and grabbing his dangling balls in my fist I pulled him up and began to lick around his tight little hole which had him pushing his arse onto my face, fucking himself on my tongue which moistened his little fuck hole with my saliva. H was obviously enjoying himself as his cock was rock hard and the pre-cum was dribbling from his piss hole over my fist which stroked the length of his shaft. before long he was sitting on the edge of the massage table and I sucked his cock deep into my throat. The weird but incredible sensation of his thick knob hitting the back of my throat made me gag, but I have learned to breathe through my nose and so continued to suck his swollen knob deep into my throat. Slipping off the table I turned him so that he leaned over the table and spreading his legs and pulling on his balls I again attacked his tight shit hole, licking and sucking on the puckered ring. I heard him murmur fuck me and so standing behind him I slipped my hard cock into his hole and began to fuck him in strong hard strokes that soon had me near orgasm. I felt the moment of no return near and with a loud moan I shot a load of spunk up his arse. Slipping my cock out I swung him around and taking his cock in my mouth Iiserted two fingers into his wet arsehole and finger fucking him and sucked him, quickly bringing him to a shuddering climax as he shot his load down the back of my throat. He was so far down my throat that I had no choice but respond to his knob jerking spunk and I swallowed his load straight down my gullet. Deliciously exciting.

Wow, that was some encounter. Shortish but memorable and just what he needed and what I enjoy, dirty and to the point, no messing as it were. I did ask if he could finish off with a piss in my mouth, but sadly, he couldn't, but he did promise to try and store some piss up for the next visit. Fingers crossed.

Hope you all enjoyed my recounting that nice little massage appointment and if you want to book a wank-chat or a massage appointment call me on 07517 697569.