MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR...

Dear readers, just a very short post to wish all my clients a lovely Christmas and a Happy New Year. I am sure my readers will appreciate the Christmas picture which made me chuckle. I am working over Christmas ( not Christmas day obviously) but have decided that I will only be seeing regular clients. I am of course still offering wank chat to everyone.

Hopefully next time I post I will have a moving date. I cannot wait now as I sit surrounded by packed boxes and all the debris associated with packing.

No dirty story this time.... but I will post a really dirty memory next post

Take care and have a lovely festive break.

Chris .

Call 07517 697569 to book an appointment or wank chat charged at £1 per minute, minimum £10 and unused minutes can of course be carried forward.

FATHER CHRISTMAS COMES BUT ONCE A YEAR...AHHH.

 Dear readers it is that time of year again when I ask clients if they are all prepared for Christmas and I am greeted with a grunt and a smirk suggesting that Christmas is as popular as syphilis....shudder at the thought of that curse. Personally I am sitting in a totally Christmas free environment because not a single piece of Christmas cheer now decorates my bare walls and instead I sit surrounded by boxes of possessions ready and waiting for the big move to my new home. It is all rather sad but weirdly cheerful at the same time because although I am saying goodbye to 20 years in my present home I am looking forward to a new start in my lovely little Victorian cottage, or it will be lovely when I have finished remodelling and decorating.

I will be working as normal over Christmas and New Year and until the end of January when I will be closing my studio for the last time. I worked out the other day that I have been doing this work, first as an escort and later as an erotic masseur fo 22 years. It has been a long time and for the most part an enjoyable adventure meeting lots of nice guys and hopefully making some friends. I looked at my records yesterday and realised some of my clients have been visiting me for 18 years, which is a long time, so I must have done something right to keep them engaged for so long. 

I am not retiring completely. I have told my regular clients that if I will carry on seeing them ( probably from the end of March) at my new home for as long as they wish to carry on seeing me. I will also carry on writing the blog which will still have erotic stories and become I hope a vehicle for my erotic writing. I have two books which are near completion but because of personal stuff have never been finished. I also have lots of ideas for new stories. My hope is that I will finish these two erotic tomes and on them build a new career as an erotic writer. I am also going to carry on offering the wank chat phone service and I am looking at other options to carry on working in the sex business. I have after all 22 years experience of dealing with men and women and meeting their sexual fantasies and helping them explore their bodies. When I was more involved in the politics of sex worker rights I used to write about sex as therapy and as a form of healing, as something even spiritual. There is after all a rich history of sacred sex where sex was understood not just as being about pleasure and/or procreation, but as a positive for spiritual, psychological and physical health. I once argued and was derided by women sex workers that one of the differences between men and women was that although both like sex for men sex was an essential for their mental health. Something worth more discussion I think. We shall see what happens in the future. 

I have told regular clients to keep my phone number or keep reading the blog because I will stop advertising at the end of January.

I have been busy entertaining regular clients and a number of new clients, including a gentleman visiting from Europe who is a fan of the blog. They all seemed to have enjoyed their little adventure and have said that they will carry on seeing me after I officially retire. One of my encounters was especially fun and illustrates that sometimes just the massage and all the attention being on the client can be very stimulating for both parties.

This particular client I have seen a few times and he has a nice regular body and a nice thick cock and some heavy balls which I find especially a turn on. I am a balls man, nothing nicer than a man bending over and two heavy balls hanging in their sack between his legs, ideally just above your mouth...but I digress. The massage began as normal, warm oil on the back and down the arse crack so that my fingers could stroke and tease the little puckered ring of his arsehole. It was not long before the massage was forgotten and his arse was in the air and I had his heavy balls grasped in my fist and as I stroked his arsehole I pulled on his ball sack gently which made his cock swing. I could not resist and as I stroked and pulled on his balls my tongue began to lick and tease his arsehole, pushing gently in between the puckered muscles making him moan in pleasure as I licked his most intimate orifice, making it twitch around my tongue. I slipped my hand down to stroke his thick cock and noticed his knob end was leaking pre-cum that mixed with the warm oil to create the perfect lube to stroke and tease his cock. All this time that I was stroking his cock my tongue continued to tease his anus and then to suck his balls, first one and then both as I tried to get them both in my mouth. I could sense he was getting close and turning round he lay on his back, his legs spread wide. It was such an inviting pose and naturally I could not resist slipping his cock deep into my throat and my fingers,  first one and then two fingers, inside his tight arsehole, stretching his rectum as he face fucked me and then suddenly I felt his arsehole grip my fingers and his cock jerk as as he ejaculated jet after jet of creamy thick salty spunk into my mouth. I was rock hard by now but he had not touched me and yet giving him such an intense orgasm was for me a job well done. 

I hope you enjoyed that little memory from only a couple of days ago. If you want to book an appointment or just to book a wank chat (£1 per minute, minimum 10 minutes but minutes can be carried) then call me on 07517 697569

I will not be posting again until the New Year so I will wish you all a happy Christmas and holiday break and hope you all get something nice for Christmas and that you all have a prosperous New Year because we all need money do we not.

Take care and happy wanking.....

Chris.

November Update and House Move

Dear clients and readers, I hope that you are all well and enjoying life as much as is possible during these fairly miserable times. I personally have good news in that I have sold my house and have had an offer accepted on a gorgeous little victorian farm cottage in rural Northumberland. Hopefully I will be moving in February, provided there are no more last minute hitches. 

The bad news is that it is further north than I had hoped, being just north of Alnwick and I have decided to partially retire. From February, I will only be seeing regular clients and when they tire of me, then I also will be retiring. I have been around for nearly 22 years, which is a long time in this business. I have for the most part had a wonderful time, have met some wonderful guys and had very memorable sex. I have mostly very fond memories which will provide the stories for my future ramblings into erotica, because although I am retiring from erotic massage, I am going to concentrate in future on writing erotic novels. I know from this blog and the book that I have already published that there is a market for hardcore erotic writing. I am often asked when my next book is being published, (which should have been finished 2 years ago) but which has been delayed because of personal stuff going on and the decision to move house after 20 years, I hope when I move to finish the second book and the edit and get it published. My plan is to spend more time writing and really build up the readership with not just dirty stories on the blog but to write books with a good story line that also have really good dirty sex bits. I once read that good written porn should have 2 good scenes to wank over per chapter, which seems fair enough. I know that I personally find most erotic novels just dull with pathetic story lines and sex senes that describe "his rampant manhood entered his secret orifice making her/him moan in pleasure," just dull, making me yawn in boredom rather than hard with lust. If I want to read about sex then I want dirty, raunchy scenes, not a Mills and Boon deflowering of innocent virgins scenario that granny could read on the bus without blushing. NO, not my style at all. The odd thing is that I am actually a bit prudish regarding sex scenes in ordinary novels where I like a good story, a bit of adventure and find love interests and scenes just a tad boring. We are all I suppose full of contradictions. I doubt if my married men would think about asking their wives to rim their arseholes or if they could piss in their mouths, all thing they enjoy when they visit me. No, they are all upstanding members of the community, wink, wink....

So dear clients this December and January may in some cases be my last chance to entertain you, which is sad, but nothing lasts forever sadly.

My little story today involves a recent encounter with a semi-regular guy who really likes his encounters short and dirty. As usual the session began with a warm oil massage, my hands sneaking between the cheeks of his tight buttocks so that my fingers stroked his puckered arsehole. I heard him moan as my fingers began to probe and stroke deeper around his anus and then down to his heavy dangling balls so that it was not long before he had raised himself so that I could hold his balls in my hand and pull on them gently before slipping my hand between his legs where I was able to take his thick shaft in my fist. Slippery with warm oil I began to slowly wank his cock, giving especial attention to his knob end which I stroked with my fingers, the warm oil mixing with the pre-cum secretions which oozed from the tip of his knob. My firm but gently massage of his cock was making him moan louder with each long stroke. I was rock hard myself by this stage and could not resist getting my face between his arse cheeks where I began sucking and licking his raised puckered arse-ring. I could feel his anus clench and unclench as I rimmed his round man-hole, making it receptive to my probing tongue as I continued to stroke his throbbing cock. He was soon on his knees and presented his thick knob end, dribbling with pre-cum to my mouth. Being the horny whore I am I enjoyed licking gently the encouraged head and playing with the strings of pre-cum that fell in silken strings from the eye of his knob. I was moaning myself with lust and taking his whole cock deep into my throat so far I choked and gagged as his knob stroked my tonsils. I was just so fucking horny that I wanted to swallow his whole fucking cock which he now thrust in and out of my mouth, giving me a good hard face fucking while I pulled on his balls and stoked his arsehole. This must have gone on for some 10 minutes until he pulled away murmuring that he was going to shoot his load too soon. Reluctantly I allowed his cock to escape my mouth, although as he slipped off the massage table I could not resist a quick lick around his arsehole as he bent across the massage table.

Eventually we moved through to the bedroom and I knelt on the bed, head down and arse up ready for a good spanking. He obliged with a few hard slaps on my arse cheeks, but he was soon stroking my arsehole with his fingers which he had spat on to provide lubricant to frig my arsehole. He then sank to his knees and began to lick my tight shit hole, pushing his tongue inside and then down to my balls and back to my arsehole. I was so excited and horny and when he stood and began rubbing his moist knob end against my hole, gently teasing my arsehole to open a little, I was in porn heaven. He played with me, rubbing his knob around the puckered hole, entering just a little. I so wanted to be fucked but I am so tight I can't take a cock and so I reluctantly rolled onto my back and he lay over me, inserting his cock into my mouth while he slipped my cock into his and so a delicious 69 ran its course for some ten minute of mutual ball sucking and cock sucking and his fingers slipping into my arsehole. I was by this time so horny that I just wanted to stick my tongue up his arsehole. I told him and he obliged by sitting on my face and then ramming his cock down my throat and then again presenting his arsehole to my tongue and so he alternated between face fucking me and making me lick his arsehole until, while I had my tongue wriggling inside his tight shit-hole I heard him grunt and murmur, fuck and as his arse-ring contracted on my tongue he squirted his creamy load of spunk over my chest. I felt the hot spunk splatter over my tits as I stroked my own cock to completion and ejaculated my sperm over my belly. I lay exhausted, covered in hot salty spunk. I was very happy, as was he, judging by the smile on his face. I shall miss these encounters when I retire. 

I hope that you have enjoyed this memory of an encounter that I had last week and that you have had a nice wank, which is what it is all about, having fun. I hope to see as many of my regulars as are able to make time for an appointment over the Christmas/New Year period. For those that can't please remember that you can book a dirty chat for £1 per minute (minimum £10) with minutes unused carried over to subsequent appointments. Call Chris on 07517 697569 to make appointments for a massage or a dirty chat. 

Regards your dirty masseur with a mind like the proverbial sewer, which is how you like it. 

Chris..

OCTOBER CATCH-UP.

Dear readers,

My apologies for being so late in posting but I had hoped to have news of my moving house, but unfortunately everything is still in limbo. I may have sold my house, but the potential buyer is messing around, so, the joys of selling houses has cursed me in full. Hopefully I will have better news for my next post, fingers and everything else crossed. 

I am going to talk little about communication and consent. I have been doing this job for a very long time and generally I get things right, but not always. I admit that on a recent appointment I misread the situation which led to a little embarrassment but hopefully has not put the client off.

The client in question is newish and this was his second appointment where he had said he had wanted to experiment a little. He started off surprising me by wanting to lick my armpits and then later he was enjoying me lying on top of him, him rimming my arsehole and generally being submissive including trying pissing on me but under my diretion like a slave situation. All of this is fine and I read the situation that he enjoyed being submissive and dominated and liked the really kinky scenario, so I assumed he was also into spitting, that is spitting into his open mouth, which is a very popular scenario for those who like the kinkier, rougher kind of sex. I quite enjoy myself it if I am in the mood and the situation is right, but I am not in general especially into either having my armpits licked or indeed spitting, mainly because I am crap at spitting. I was that posh kid at school who could never spit like the other boys, I am embarrassed to admit, but when the situation demands in this job I do my best. To cut a long story short he decided he didn't like spitting, which was a relief to me but it led to a kind of pregnant pause as I recalculated what he was enjoying and what he was not. This highlights however why communication is so important and a reminder that I should have asked him first if he wanted to try spitting not least because you should always ask first before doing anything different. To be honest however, pausing sex to ask permission can also cause an odd and sometimes awkward pause and because I normally do read the situation correctly, it has never caused an issue in the past, but I mention it now for two reasons, A)  I should not assume you enjoy a sexual kink and B) please tell me in advance if you are into anything a little different, not least that if this client had mentioned that he liked licking armpits I would not have used a roll on deodorant, which from the way he quickly desisted obviously didn't taste nice. .....Moving on I hope he remains a client. I think he realised that a little mistake had been made. The rest of the appointment was great fun and he seemed to have enjoyed himself, which is what it is all about. But, please, tell me what you do like, do not like, because it just saves embarrassment during an appointment

I promised a story involving a female client. I do not get many female clients and usually they come as a M/F couple. On this occasion a middle aged couple had booked an appointment and I had to massage her while her partner watched and perhaps joined in.

She undressed and showered and I began to massage her while he showered before joining us by sitting on a chair close to the massage table so that he could watch. I began the massage with long strokes down her back and over her buttocks and slowly and gently I allowed my hands to slip between her legs and my fingers began gently to stroke first her anus and then the shaved lips of her cunt. She was nervous and I could feel that she was very dry at first but as I teased and stroked her outer cunt lips I could feel her getting wet and as my fingers stroked in-between her pussy lips I heard her moan and my fingers were becoming very sticky. I began to spend more time massaging over her anus and over her cunt , my fingers slipping deeper and deeper into her cunt with every stroke. I noticed her husband was now stroking his thick cock, slowly, his eyes riveted upon my sticky fingers which were now slipping in and out of her cunt in long strokes, fucking her gently but firmly with my fingers. I heard him murmur to his wife to roll over and I stood back, allowing her to roll onto her back. I noticed that her nipples were erect and very red, so she was obviously enjoying herself. I then began to massage her breasts, paying special attention to her nipples. While I was stroking her erect nipples and massaging her heavy breasts with warm oil her husband moved to stand behind me so that I felt his thick cock rubbing against my arsehole, which was making me very hard. He then moved to stand beside me so that he could reach her cunt and I watched mesmerised as he pushed four fingers inside her wet, sticky cunt and begin to fuck her with his fingers, his thumb rubbing her clit. She had now opened her legs wide allowing him to hand fuck her while I sucked on her nipples. She arched her back suddenly and was breathing heavily and obviously was coming close to an orgasm. I felt him grab my erect cock with his free  hand and as he finger fucked her to orgasm he stroked my cock for a while before indicating that I get on my knees and suck his cock. I happily allowed his thick cock to slip down my throat, his dribbling pre-cum tasting salty and delicious. He then slipped his hand out of her cunt and she slipped off the massage table and straddled over my face as I now sat on the floor, giving me a nice view of her gapping cunt and wet puckered arsehole. I was fascinated by her moist and very wet cunt which he told me to lick, "suck her fucking clit", I heard him moan and so I obliged her clit, slipping my tongue over her soaking cunt and the hard nipple of her clit as she opened her legs wider. I watched his cock come into view between her legs and I could not resist giving it another suck before directing it with my hand, rubbing his wet knob end long the length of her slit before slipping it into her cunt. I watched fascinated as it slipped in and out as he began to fuck her with long hard strokes, his balls swinging low. I naturally could not resist giving his heavy dangling balls a squeeze as he slipped his thick cock faster in and out of her dripping cunt that gripped his shaft, making a strange sucking noise as he fucked her. Then I heard him moan and pulling gently on his balls I was delighted to see the shaft of his cock contract as he began ejaculating into her cunt. I love watching a cock fuck a cunt or an arsehole and being lucky enough to see the contractions of the shaft as a man shoots his spunk deep inside. There is nothing more deliciously wicked and sexual than watching a close up of a cock emptying a heavy ball load of spunk into a willing orifice. 

I watched his cock slip out of her cunt and yes I gave it a lick, spunky, cunt soaked cock is delicious and as I sucked him dry and watched his spunk dribble down her thigh I shot my load over his foot. didn't mean too, it just spurted out in that direction. Who says this job does not have variety. As a treat she allowed me to watch her piss. I do like variety.

I hope that you enjoyed this brief encounter from a few years ago and I hope the couple involved who were visiting Newcastle on business have fond memories of a very dirty and sexy encounter.

A note too couples. I prefer to see you at my place, I sometimes like to see one partner singularly before hand and I do not promise to fuck the woman but happy to do everything else.

PS I hope you like the artwork. this is not mine, but I am going to try and do some original erotic drawings for your amusement and titillation and to enhance the stories.

SEPTEMBER UPDATE and EROTIC FUN.

 Dear readers, I hope that all is well and that this change in the weather has not left everyone too depressed I also hope that everyone had a nice little holiday and that you are ready for some dirty massage fun. August and thus far September, have been surprisingly busy with lots of new clients and of course the old familiar faces despite the school holidays etc. I say faces, although I do spend more time with my tongue up clients arseholes and therefore admit that actual faces are often a mystery, if you get my meaning. I know, I am a slut but a happy one and would my clients want me any other way. Be honest?

I have nothing to report on the moving front although I have seen a house that I do rather like, not ideal, but nice and in a quiet spot in a northumberland village, so I may pursue this and will keep everyone informed regarding my moving house and whither I decide to carry on working. The latter is all up in the air. Sometimes I think its time to retire, but then clients ask me to carry on, so we will see how I feel when I move.

So many dirty sex stories to tell you but I shall recall briefly my meeting with two new clients and one with one of my favourite regulars.

I was very pleased to meet one new client from Yorkshire who is a big fan of my blog, so if you are reading this then I hope you have a nice wank and remember my licking your tight little puckered hole. This guy really liked getting his arsehole licked out and moaned appreciatively as my tongue sneaked past the tight sphincter ring into his tight passage, teasing his arsehole while I stroked his fat cock which dribble pre--cum as I fucked his arse with my tongue. He also enjoyed rimming by puckered ring and claimed it was his first time touching another guys cock and balls and rimming another mans arsehole. If it was he did well. His tongue was enthusiastic and moist as he licked from my balls up to and around my puckered hole. I am nursing a hard-on now as I type. he also pissed on me, which again was a first for him and as you all know, being pissed on is such a kink for me. He seemed to enjoy his hour and said that he would return soon, so I look forward to seeing him again in the near future.

Another new client was a young man soon to be married who again is a big fan of this blog. My apologies when I saw him, because I was not on top form and I had developed some eczema on my balls so they were a bit rough and crinkled rather than soft and dangling which is how balls should be. One of those things sadly which only lasted two days and was gone. I hope my balls not being in full working order did not put him off. He seemed to enjoy the encounter however and after my rimming his tight little hole he set abut licking my shit hole with abandon, slipping his tongue around the puckered circle and dating his tongue inside as I knelt on the bed, arsehole in the air and ready for assault. He then rubbed his fat knob- end up and down my arse crack and teased my hole, which I really enjoy. I love a hard knob-end just pressing against the arse-ring, opening it slightly without pushing in. A truly delicious sensation if you have never tried it. Our dirty £80 session went very well and ended with my kneeling over his face and squirting my hot spunk over his lips and tongue. Something very dirty about spunking on a younger guys face, it makes you feel like a really old pervert, especially if you wash it off with piss. I do not usually like young guys especially ( the guy was probably in his late 20s) but this one had that look of innocent waiting to be debauched, so why not me. I wonder if his future wife is aware of what a dirty sex life she is going to enjoy?

My final memory involves my sexy daddy type who just loves me rimming his arsehole. He has the almost perfect hard rounded cheeks that spread to reveal a circle of wrinkled delight that winks at you as you massage it and then lick it. On this occasion he had drank lots of water and so treated me to a long piss session. 

He was hard from my initial rimming before he told me that he was ready to piss. His thick cock remained hard as I then licked and sucked the moist knob as I knelt before him. He suddenly started pissing into my mouth like a horse, as I sucked his horse cock deep down my throat before withdrawing it almost out of my mouth and then inserting it deep down my throat once more. His hot piss quickly filled my mouth and I admit I had no option but to swallow, indeed I wish he had told me to swallow his dirty piss, I was so turned on by the sensation of this man using my mouth as his toilet. He must have filled my mouth five or six times, as I allowed the hot piss to escape and dribble down my chin and onto my chest and then dribble down onto my cock which was of course hard and so near ejaculating. 

When he had finished his piss his cock, still rock hard, slipped from my mouth. I observed the few last dribbled jets of piss and sucked his cock hard to catch the last dribbled of piss and pre-cum. He then made me stand and he french kissed me, obviously enjoying sucking my tongue and tasting his own piss. We then moved through to the bedroom and I knelt on the bed and presented my arse for his pleasure. He rubbed his hard cock shaft up and down my arse crack and pushed against my arsehole with is knob-end which quivered in anticipation of being stretched and filled . I so wanted to be fucked, but all I can take now is a finger, which he soon obliged me with. Eventually I lay on the bed and he sat on my face allowing me once gain to lick his arsehole before he leaned forward and began to suck on my cock which I was wanking furiously. He then kelt over my face and inserted his cock into my mouth and began to fuck me deep in my throat. Honestly, his cock is the perfect fit. It slides down my throat, filling it with perfection. 

While he face fucked me I was wanking furiously with one hand while stroking his arsehole with my other. He asked me to finger his arse as I sucked on his cock. I obliged with first one finger and then two as he fucked me forcefully in my throat and then I felt his arsehole grip my two fingers which were deep inside him and as his anus contracted repeatedly so dd his cock which jerked in spasms as he shot jet after jet of hot creamy spunk straight down my throat and I swallowed without tasting. I am normally not submissive but with the right client I most certainly am. OH, and he never took his cock out of my mouth until I had wanked myself off. Seriously it is had to explain the pleasure of sucking a hard cock dry while wanking yourself off. I was in perfect heaven and I am sure that he enjoyed himself and I hope he is equally as horny next time he visits.

So der perverts. I hope that you have enjoyed my memoirs and had a very satisfying wank. I look forward to seeing you and remember that I do dirty sex chat at £1 a minute, minimum payment £10 and you can carry unused minutes over. lots of ways to pay. Just call Chris on 07517 697569 to book an appointment or sex chat. Take care and remember that shy boys have no dirty cock and arse fun. On my next post I will tell you all about an encounter with a female client. I rarely get single female clients, so this is a special which I hope you will enjoy next time.

Take care.

Chris

07517 697569

AUGUST CATCH-UP..

 Dear readers, 

I hope that you are all well and enjoying your summer holidays. I apologise for not posting in July, but seriously it was not a good month. It began busy, then went quiet and so I decided to have a week off and had some really nice days out with family and friends. When I returned to work however I had to deal with two awful clients. I rarely complain about clients, because the majority are really nice guys. These two however, well, I will not bore you with details, but the first was very obviously allergic to soap and water ( no oral and I even wore condom's on my fingers), and the second was just very intimidating. I am rarely intimidated by anyone, but on this occasion he just made me feel unsafe and he had a weird paranoia about the door bell taking a video of him. He was seriously unpleasant and thankfully did not stay the hour. Thankfully the third client on my return was really peasant and a horny time was had and a very pleasant hour passed too quickly. 

The remainder of July passed by without mishap, but nothing especially exciting to write about, which is why I skipped my monthly post about my adventures. 

August and to a certain extend September are usually quiet months because my daddy types who make up most of my clients tend to be on holiday with their little darlings, so I have been concentrating on packing ready for the big move, although the house is still not sold. trust me to pick the worst year to try and sell, but I am in no rush.

I have decided to recount one of my adventures from nearly 20 years ago when I was escorting in London which I had intended keeping for my dirty memoirs, book 2, but I shall recall it briefly now for your edification. So, hands on cocks and off we go.

I was booked by a client who was staying in one of the prestigious hotels in Mayfair. He was obviously not short of a few pounds because he booked me a room to stay overnight separate from his suite. This happened quite often because my clients knew that I did not stay in London and although some booked overnights and wanted me to stay in the room with them, many, especially the wealthier clients tended to want their own space after having their fun and since most had staff who also had to be accommodated, booking an extra room for their, erm,  escort, was no big deal, even in the most expensive hotels. Seriously it was a very different world to doing erotic massage in the North East now.

This client was as I expected Arab and so I had an idea that it was going to be a very kinky night, they always were with Arabs.  After the usual hello's and was your trip a pleasant one and was your room (mine) satisfactory, he was straight to business. He offered me a glass of champagne, which I accepted. I need to read these papers, he explained, but you must eat my ass. He then knelt on the sofa and began to read some paper on the table behind. "Come, lick my dirty ass clean), he called. Obligingly I fell onto my knees and pulled down his jogging pants to reveal his round buttocks and as he spread his legs, his arse cheeks opened to reveal his brown puckered hole. It was a very nice hole, brown and nicely puckered in a raised round ring with just a fuzz of hair on the cheeks. Applying my tongue, I began to lick around his arsehole,, then up and down the crack of his arse before applying my lips to his bum hole which I began to suck and lick, teasing the sensitive ring and gently fucking him with my tongue. 

As I licked his dirty hole he pushed his arse back revealing heavy balls which swung low and free and cock which was long and very thick and very stiff a it waved freely. I naturally could not resist grabbing his balls and began pulling them gently. They felt deliciously soft and heavy in their wrinkled sack. I put my spare hand between his legs and began to stroke his thick cock, all the time still slurping on his puckered shit hole. 

He was very excited now, his moaning with pleasure was loud and interspersed with crude instructions to stick my tongue further up his arsehole. I had slipped my own pants off and my stiff cock  dribbled pre-cum onto the velvet sofa. Suddenly he turned round and sitting he pulled my mouth onto his engorged knob end. His thick cock filled my mouth and as he grabbed my head he began to fuck my throat, pushing his cock deep into my gullet, making me gag as he lifted his arse off the sofa as he fucked my face, but he did not give any mercy but instead continued to make me suck his cock, all the time mouthing obscenities about filling my arse with his spunk and that I was a dirty cock sucking cunt.

"I heard him gasp after about five minutes of face fucking that, "I want of fuck your ass". He then stood up and indicated that I knelt on the sofa, my arse in the air, my arsehole ready for his thick cock to tear it apart. I saw him lube his cock and then I felt his thick knob run up and down the crack of my arse and push gently against my puckered ring and then, more forcefully he pushed until I allowed him to enter and then I felt his thick cock slide deep into my arse. I felt my arsehole being stretched to fuck as his cock filled me. Stopping for a while he allowed me to get used to the sensation of being full and then he began to fuck, pumping his thick fucking cock deep inside, withdrawing to the knob-end before plunging deep inside me again. His fucking went on for some time. I stroked my own cock in rhythm to his fucking my arse and then, with a load moan, he exploded, shooting his load of spunk deep into my arsehole, I felt his cock jerk strongly inside me as at the same time I also exploded, my cock jerking creamy spunk over the dark blue velvet of the sofa. We both lay still for a few minutes, I was trapped under his weight, and then I felt his cock slide out of my hole and he murmured "Good fuck"' before standing. "You enjoy that", he smiled. "Erm, yep"' I replied. "Good, now you go and get cleaned back in your room and I will call you soon. So off I went, my arse pleasantly aching from being stretched by his thick cock to shower and wait for his call, about an hour later, for round 2, which was even more dirty than round 1. So it continued until about 3 in the morning when we were both tired and I retired to my room to sleep and leave the next morning clutching a fat envelope full of cash and a selection of posh toiletries curtesy of the hotel. 

I certainly had a good time while escorting in London, all very different from today and of course I used to be fucked in those days. Now I am top only although I do still enjoy a good fingering and rimming. I hope that you enjoyed this encounter and I hope to see all my regulars for  dirty session of rimming and fucking very soon and if you fancy pissing on me, well, that's my favourite kink, so do not be shy and give me a call. Remember that I also do dirty wank chat for a £1 a minute, minimum spend 10 minutes, but you can carry unused minutes over. 

Call Chris on 07517 697569 to book a dirty massage or wank chat. 

Take care and remember it's all good clean, but dirty fun.

JUNE UPDATE.

Dear readers,

I hope that you are all enjoying this lovely weather which I admit is far too hot for me. I am no sun worshipper and worse I have hurt my back. I somehow have managed to pull a muscle or something, so I am in agony every time I move, even walking is painful. I am forced therefore to take a couple of days off, As I write this I am resting my back against an ice block which is pure bliss. This is all very annoying because it has been a very busy month and I have had to turn people away, which I hate doing, especially if they are regular clients. But such is life.

No movement on the house yet, so for clients who are concerned that I am moving I can confirm that it looks like I will be here for at least another 3 months, so plenty of time to book an appointment and have a little fun. Remember that wank chat is still very popular and even when incapacitated, as now, I can still talk on the phone and of course you all know how dirty I can be.

Since my last scribble I have met a number of new clients who I think had a fun time and they all said that they would return, so hopefully they will become regulars. I also of course had visits from my established clients, including a second appointment from the male/female couple whom I wrote about in my last post. It was very nice to meet them again because couples rarely book twice, no idea why, I have always assumed it was because having tried something different, ie, a threesome, they move on to something else. This couple however seem to be very adventurous sexually and want to try different things, not just a threesome involving a couple of positions. So, if you are sitting comfortably, I will titillate you with a brief description of what was a very horny, dirty and satisfying appointment.

This time they were both wanting to get straight into the action and not bother with the massage, which was fine. While they showered I stripped naked and hopped onto the bed and stroked my cock until it was hard and ready for some oral. They both, naked, took turns sucking my cock before she decided she wanted to lick his arsehole while he continued sucking my cock. It was all quite delicious, but my regulars know how much I love rimming a clean arsehole and so it was not long before I suggested he sit on my face so that I could stick my tongue up his arse and enjoy licking his puckered hole and of course his balls which were dangling, inviting my mouth to gorge on the heavy, plump sack which I proceeded to lick and suck, each ball individually and then together. While I enjoyed playing with his balls she continued to suck my cock before changing to his so that he was getting his arse licked and cock sucked at the same time. He was obviously enjoying the sensation, perhaps a little too much because I heard him murmur to stop and that he wanted to be fucked. 

Laying on his back he lifted his legs to allow me a full view of his puckered hole and cock and balls. Pushing his legs back over his head I positioned myself so that I could slip my cock into his arse-ring and then proceeded to fuck him, slowly at first and then building the tempo to a hard fuck that went on for some time while she kissed him passionately. It was all extraordinarily decadent but perfect. 

After fucking his arse for a time he asked if I fancied anything that would perhaps make me come and so I said that a finger up my arse often did the trick. With no hesitation she obliged. It was quite delicious feeling her fingers stroke around my arsehole and then slip a finger into the tight puckered hole while I was fucking her man, The result of feeling her finger stretch my arsehole was that I was soon ready to come and did so quite suddenly, filling his arse as my cock jerked, ejaculating my spunk into the condom. I remember that I especially enjoyed the wonderful sensations of his arsehole gripping my cock as my orgasm receded and my cock slipped out of his arse. I am always very sensitive after I have come and so I stood and went to clean up while they decided what their next position should be which basically was her requesting some cock.

Quickly changing position, she now lay on her back, legs spread, a glass dildo inserted deep into her arsehole. I joined them again on the bed and noticed that her cunt was very wet. I remember stroking gently between her cunt lips and teasing her swollen clit as he slid his cock deep into her pussy. I was quite fascinated by her face which flushed scarlet as he fucked her, proving that she genuinely was excited by the situation as much as he was. It is so nice to see a couple enjoying themselves without any shame or embarrassment. 

As he fucked her with long, deep strokes, I fondled the cheeks of his arse and slipped my fingers between his arse-cheeks to tease his wet arsehole, slipping my finger in, so that he was being frigged while he fucked. She was very excited and asked to suck my cock, which she did while he fucked her furiously, sliding his cock in and out of her cunt. As she sucked my cock deep into her mouth I felt myself grow hard again and I suggested that he may like to try being fucked up the arse while he fucked her cunt, a suggestion he readily agreed with and so I positioned my self behind and as he pulled back I slipped my cock into his bum hole and a very peasant fuck commenced. I actually had very little work to do because as he fucked her cunt he also fucked his arsehole on my cock on the return motion. I smiled, thinking that he was being well and truly fucked this time, all he needed was a cock in his mouth and he would have been full up, as it were. After enjoying this magnificent menage a trois for a while he asked me to slip my cock out of his arse which I did and moving round I stroked her cunt and breasts while he fucked her furiously until he released a long sigh and slipping his cock out of her pussy he ejaculated over her belly and breasts. 

Another appointment had ended and I think they both had enjoyed themselves once again, On a text later that evening he asked if I had enjoyed the appointment, which I had and I suggested that since she liked a dildo up her arse while being fucked that she may enjoy double penetration, a cock in her cunt and another up her arsehole. He seemed quite excited by this suggestion so we shall see if they return to try that position. It could be fun which is what it is all about. I have also suggested that another speciality my couple clients have enjoyed in the past has been me licking her cunt and his cock and balls while they fuck. I am assured that it is very sensual and usually results in an orgasm by both parties. I remember once having a woman spray over my face as I was licking her cunt while he was fucking her arse. That was a few years ago and I believe that I have written about the appointment. Yes, I have had lots of interesting appointments over the years.

I sometimes sense a little jealously that some client think that I have this fantastic sex life and I suppose  in some respects I do, but it is worth remembering that receiving pleasure for my benefit is way down the list of priorities in this job and a job it is. Yes it is nice if I enjoy what I am doing with a client but ultimately all of my clients, like this couple, book me to be safe and discreet. I have to have the responsibility of being tested regularly and to check my clients for any signs of disease, and thankfully in over 20 years  have never caught anything. Most of my clients are married men and I would never knowingly put them at risk. Perhaps more important however is discretion and privacy. Like this couple, my clients come to me knowing that I would never contact them without permission, would never bother them for bookings or meet ups etc and neither would I ever disclose personal details on this blog or anything else. Clients pay for safety and privacy and discretion, knowing they can experiment, have a bit of fun and then walk away and resume their lives safe in the knowledge that I am invisible. This arrangement suits me as well because I expect the same discretion in return and so far nearly all of my clients have honoured that unwritten agreement.

So dear readers I hope that you find my latest adventure entertaining and satisfying and I hope to meet you sometime for an appointment or to share a wank chat. Call Chris on 07517 697569 to book a massage or wank chat. Have fun and play safe..

MAY HAS BEEN INTERESTING.

 Dear readers, 

just a short update. May has been busy and eventful. Moving house is progressing although no definite new home has been chosen, although I have two that have potential. I am close to making a decision and will inform everyone of that choice as soon as I am able.

Lots of new clients this month including a couple (m/f) appointment which I will recall in gloriously erotic detail a little later. I also met up with a couple of regular clients whom I thought had moved on because I had not seen them for a few months. Glad to say they were rampant and entertaining and promised to resume their regular visits. One of the sad aspects of this job is that you have regular client whom you entertain for years and you get to know them well and then they just disappear and you have no idea what has happened. One of the golden rules of this job is that you never contact clients unless they specifically give permission to contact them for a particular reason, for example, two of my regular clients have asked me to text them when my new book is available ( delayed because I have become caught up with moving). 

Clients do move on eventually but I will always be around in one form or another because if I decide to retire from erotic massage I intend devoting my time to writing erotica and this blog will keep everyone informed of what I am doing, what I am publishing and of course where I am.

I do expect to be moved this summer, so if anyone wants to visit while I am still in Newcastle, then you may only have a few months to do so. Obviously the wank-chat service remains available and is still very popular, so if you cannot see me in person but are feeling horny, give me a call and for £1 a minute you can be as dirty as you like over the phone. Various ways to pay, minimum spend is £10 for ten minutes and of course you can carry minutes you have not used over to your next dirty chat.

I admit that because I have not been feeling great over the last few months ( feeling much better now thankfully) I was therefore not looking forward to meeting this couple that rang for an appointment and I was on the verge of cancelling them. Thankfully I didn't cancel because I think, despite me not being on top form, that the appointment went well. Threesomes are always hit or miss, they either are wonderful or a disaster, no in-betweens. 

The couple were very nice when they arrived, slim and attractive and he especially was very nervous. Normally it is the woman who is more nervous but on this instance she was really in charge and very respectful. To cut to the chase, it began after they had showered and he called me over to join them asking if I was really into pissing. Naturally I said yes and falling on my knees he began by taking a long piss in my mouth while she kissed him passionately. i enjoyed sucking his semi-stiff cock into my mouth as he pissed for the longest times, filling my mouth with his hot piss straight from the tap as it were. I was instantly hard and excited of course, I always am when pissing is involved. When he eventually finished pissing and I had drained the last drops we moved to the massage table where I invited her to join me in giving him a four hand massage, concentrating on his buttocks and running our fingers over his puckered arsehole. Slipping my hand down between his legs I began to massage his balls and cock while she moved to the front of the massage table and began to kiss him while I was tonguing his anus. I continued rimming him, licking down around his balls while he stroked my cock. Soon he was kneeling and we then took turns rimming his arsehole, playing with  his balls and cock until she began to suck his cock deep into her mouth while he, now very excited, wanked my cock, harder and harder. We now were very excited  and I asked her if it was ok for me to caress her breasts, which she was fine with, and so between me playing with her breasts, him stroking my cock and me tongue fucking his arsehole, a very pleasant second round was brought to a close. 

We decided to move into the bedroom where they both wanted to work on me and so laying on the bed she told him to suck my cock, which he did, nervously at first, but then as she encouraged him to take my cock deeper into his throat, which he did, relishing his first time sucking a mans cock and I was very happy with his performance. He asked her to suck my cock and with my permission she did. I have been sucked by a few women and in general men do better blow jobs,  but she was very good, taking me deep into her throat and sucking down to the root. Should she decide to work at some point she would do well on blow jobs alone. Things then progressed into him fucking her while I played with her breasts and stroked her clit. She then asked me to fuck him, which I did, while they both kissed and she stroked and sucked his cock while I fucked his tight arse with hard thrust to his great pleasure. He then decided that he wanted to fuck her again while I again played with her clit. I could not resist stroking his arsehole and balls and slipping my fingers into his wet, well fucked arse so that I was frigging him while he fucked her. He slipped his cock out of her cunt twice so that I could suck him, savouring her sticky cunt juice and I think she enjoyed watching. 

So the hour passed with him giving her quite a hard fuck again while I knelt behind and kissed his balls and arsehole and played with his dangling balls while he thrust his cock in and out of her cunt, a delightful vision to watch close up. I wished they had done doggy because they could have experienced my third specialty, the first being rimming, the second rimming a nice arse while fucking and the third is licking a wet cunt and clit and his cock while it slips in and out of a wet cunt. HMMM, I am so hard now just thinking about that position, his cock slipping out of her cunt and into my mouth. Perhaps next time. He then asked me to spunk over him while she sucked him, but as I had explained I  was not feeling on top form and had performed far better than I had expected, so  I declined, which was sad but not too sad because I soon bent over and presented him my arsehole which, while kissing her, he wanked against until he shot his hot spunk all over my arsehole and buttocks. 

So ended a very hot little session which I think they both enjoyed and I certainly did enjoy far more than I had expected. One thing not mentioned is that throughout the appointment she had a glass dildo inserted in her anus, but it was never mentioned or made use of. Perhaps they were too shy, who knows. 

Anyone fancying a couples appointment please feel free to ask. I charge 50% extra, so an hour would be £150 etc and I am not pedantic about times etc and if things run over a little, that's fine,

I hope you enjoyed reading about this little adventure. Please call 07517 697569 to book an appointment or wank-chat. 

Take care dear readers, stay hard and randy, it is all good fun and done in the best possible taste.

Chris

April Update

 Dear readers,

I hope that life is treating you all well and that you are stiff with anticipation for the next recollection of another sexy adventure in my dirty little massage emporium of perversity and lust. I often wonder what you call a collection of perverts, a perversity of perverts perhaps? 

I have two snippets of bad news to relate sadly. 

Firstly, I have been unwell for a few days with my stomach. My regular clients know that I had to undergo major stomach surgery some 25 years ago. Well, my stomach has been playing up recently and I have to go for some biopsies. So I am having a few days off but should be back, stiff and ready for more adventures by next Wednesday, 3rd May. In the meantime I am still available for wank chat and my regulars are welcome to call and if I can I will of course indulge you with my infamous massage experience. In 20years in this business I have never taken time off because of my health, so this is a novel experience for me. 

Secondly when you visit you will notice that I have a for sale sign outside of the house. I am moving, or hope to move. How long this will take who knows. I have lived in my present home for 20 years but being a country lad at heart and now that I am not tied into travelling to London and Manchester on business every month, I dream of being surrounded by sheep and horses again and no cars or neighbours. I have not come to a decision yet on whither I will carry on working or retiring or semi retiring. I do not intend travelling too far away from Newcastle, so no need to panic that I am disappearing to the Outer Hebrides. 

Readers of this blog who have been putting off visiting should however take the plunge over the next few months and visit, just in case I do retire or decide to restrict my appointments to established clients only.

Other than being unwell for a few weeks, April has been very busy with a few new clients. It is always nice to meet new clients. Clients are naturally often a little nervous when they visit for the first time and of course I am as well. I want my clients to have a fabulous time but I am always a little nervous about how raunchy they expect me to be. I try to let the client set the pace, because for some it is the first time they have had a sexual encounter with a man and touching a hard cock can be daunting, even intimidating. I have known clients shake with nerves and others be so excited they come as soon as I touch their arse, which sort of spoils the appointment if they have booked for an hour and they orgasm in the first 10 minutes.  

Every person has their peculiar sexual likes and dislikes. Some guys are just fascinated by cocks and only want their cock played with, others like there arsehole played with or their balls, some like to have their nipples bitten and sucked and stroked and teased. I personally am an arsehole man, I love my arsehole being played with, rimmed and fingered. I would rather a client stroked my arsehole than suck my cock, especially if they want me or come during an appointment. A good appointment should be about discovering what excites the client, what they like and do not like.  

One new client, a mature gentleman, booked an appointment a couple of weeks ago and he was delighted to experience for the first time the joy of rimming and having his puckered hole stroked and teased. The appointment began as always on the massage table and my massaging warm oil over his back and then between his arse-cheeks. I soon had him moaning in pleasure and before long his arse was in the air and I was running my fingers down the crack of his arse, stroking his puckered anus and cupping his balls which I began to pull gently while stroking his hard cock, pushing my hand between his legs. He soon moaned for me to stop because he was near coming. As he slipped off the massage table to go through to the bedroom, I could not resist falling to my knees and worshipping his round wrinkled arsehole which twitched as I drove my tongue deep between the puckered ring, entering his wet and twitching anus. "I have dream't of this so often", he muttered, "and now it is happening its just incredible" as he pushed his arsehole with increased gusto and passion onto my hard, probing tongue.

After a little more rimming we made our way through to the bedroom and I hopped onto the bed on my knee's. presenting my arse-ring  for his inspection. He began to stroke me gently with his fingers that he had wet with his spittle. I sensed him struggling with the idea of taking the plunge and tonguing my dirty little hole. He did not think about it for too long however because I suddenly felt his hard tongue running around the rim of my anus. The sensation was delicious, especially when he started to milk my cock while sucking on my arsehole.After five or ten minutes of delicious tongue action he stood and presented his hard cock to my anus and began to rub pre-cum soaked knob end over my greedy little arsehole which twitched in anticipation of being fucked. Regular readers will remember I wrote a post on rimming with your knob, and he had obviously read the blog post and was joyfully living the fantasy. I kept murmuring, "fuck my arsehole, shoot that spunk over my arse and then piss over my dirty shit hole to wash your spunk off my arse". I was lost in lust and he was very much enjoying himself. "Do it to me". he begged. So changing positions I began to massage his arsehole with my knob end, dribbling pre-cum over his bum hole and watching it dribble over his balls. I was getting so close to coming and told him I would shoot my load if he was ready. He had other plans and changing position he had me kneel over him and inserting his finger deep into my anus I wanked myself off over his face. Opening his mouth he greedily used his tongue to lick the spunk off of my ejaculating knob and into his mouth. Laying back, his face covered in  my spunk, that glistened in white thick globules on his chin, he wanked himself furiously. Kneeling between his legs I inserted a couple of fingers into his arsehole, stretching the ring while sucking on his balls. Before long he let out a long, low moan that lasted it seems for ages as he fired copious amounts of sperm into my mouth and over his tummy. 

When he had finished a strange silence descended while we both recovered our strength. We had both experienced an especially intense orgasm and he, it seemed, was experiencing a sexual bliss that he had not had for a long time. I think he murmured something about it being like his first time. I presumed the first time he had wanked, but I didn't enquire because it was very obvious that he was leaving a very happy client.

I hope that you have enjoyed this dirty little memory. Please comment if you enjoyed the blog and please read the book My Dirty Memoirs" because it is all true and all my adventures are recounted with the intention of arousing you interest. I also have a new book being released very soon, yet another erotic adventure but this time set in victorian London. Details will be released soon.

Do give me a call if you want to book a one to one appointment or a dirty wank chat, Take care and hope to see you soon. 

Call me on 07517 697569 

WHAT TO DO WITH MY BLOG .

 This is a very short post. 

I have been wondering recently what to do with my blog. Do I keep it as it is or shall I develop it into more of a dirty story blog to help sell my erotic writing or shall I go more into the politics of the job itself and talk more about being a sex worker and about clients etc. I would love some feed back on what you, my readers would like to read. My clients are the reason that I exist and I aim to please. 

I am thinking about releasing my new book in 3 stages and charging £1.99 for each edition of chapters. They are all very erotic and guaranteed two wanks minimum per chapter. Do you all think that this would be a good idea. I am sure sales would prompt me to write quicker and devote more energy to the project. Would you be willing to purchase special addition copies, which would be more expensive or perhaps clients may like to buy disks with the stories on or have files with chapters sent direct to them on receipt of monies. Please let me know your thoughts.

Please reply in comments or text if that is easier etc.

Call Chris to book a wank chat or massage appointment on 07517697569 

chris. 

MARCH HAS BEEN AMUSING

H, readers, I hope that everyone is well and despite all the gloom and doom as horny as ever. March has just been one of those months. After a very busy December, January and February things have been a little on the quiet side, although if I am honest, my availability has been limited because I have had lots going on privately to keep my busy. What has filled me with glee however has been the abusive texts from a competitor, my blog being reported to blogger and a nasty email from someone transitioning who accused me of transphobia I think and not knowing my gay history. It is pure joy this business NOT:)..

The nasty tweets accusing me of being stuck up etc simply confirmed why I avoid all contact with others in this business. I love sex work and I have campaigned for many years for decriminalisation, but sadly I also have learned the hard way to avoid others in this business and reporting posts on my blog (for the 2nd time) was just a bit pointless because they just put the post behind an adult only block which the whole blog is behind anyway, so pointless waste of their time. The nasty email was just a tad weird. I simply state in my do's and don't's that I do not see cross dressers which is a kink where some men like to dress in women's clothes, especially lingerie. It is a kink that does not turn me on and so if the person booking is in to cross dressing then there are escorts who cater specifically for that kink and they would be better seeing someone who is sexually excited by that scenario. I do not totally exclude genuine transexuals and have massaged and entertained women transitioning to men and men transitioning to women. I have zero problems with transexuals. We live in weird times however where the extreme trans lobby look to find offence when none is intended.  I did once have a booking where the client turned up in a skirt and high heels and was witnessed by my neighbours.  This totally horrified me as I live in a nice discreet area and do not bring attention to myself.

On brighter note, I should have more availability in April and of course I am free to entertain over the telephone with my ever popular wank chat service until around 9pm most evenings. Give me a call if you are feeling horny. My number for both wank chat and to book one to one appointments is 07517 697569.

In what little spare time I have had I have been working on my new erotic novel which is edging toward completion. I have also had one exciting encounter which I am sure that you will all enjoy reading about.

A new client arrived and as usual was a little nervous having never done "anything like this before" to quote his exact words. After his shower he was soon on the table and ready for my hands to explore his firms body. He had lovely rounded buttocks and low hanging balls which always turn me on. I have a thing about big dangling balls, not so much big cocks. 

My fingers stroked down over his puckered hole and I heard him moan with pleasure and it was not long before he had his arse in the air and grabbing his dangling balls in my fist I pulled him up and began to lick around his tight little hole which had him pushing his arse onto my face, fucking himself on my tongue which moistened his little fuck hole with my saliva. H was obviously enjoying himself as his cock was rock hard and the pre-cum was dribbling from his piss hole over my fist which stroked the length of his shaft. before long he was sitting on the edge of the massage table and I sucked his cock deep into my throat. The weird but incredible sensation of his thick knob hitting the back of my throat made me gag, but I have learned to breathe through my nose and so continued to suck his swollen knob deep into my throat. Slipping off the table I turned him so that he leaned over the table and spreading his legs and pulling on his balls I again attacked his tight shit hole, licking and sucking on the puckered ring. I heard him murmur fuck me and so standing behind him I slipped my hard cock into his hole and began to fuck him in strong hard strokes that soon had me near orgasm. I felt the moment of no return near and with a loud moan I shot a load of spunk up his arse. Slipping my cock out I swung him around and taking his cock in my mouth Iiserted two fingers into his wet arsehole and finger fucking him and sucked him, quickly bringing him to a shuddering climax as he shot his load down the back of my throat. He was so far down my throat that I had no choice but respond to his knob jerking spunk and I swallowed his load straight down my gullet. Deliciously exciting.

Wow, that was some encounter. Shortish but memorable and just what he needed and what I enjoy, dirty and to the point, no messing as it were. I did ask if he could finish off with a piss in my mouth, but sadly, he couldn't, but he did promise to try and store some piss up for the next visit. Fingers crossed.

Hope you all enjoyed my recounting that nice little massage appointment and if you want to book a wank-chat or a massage appointment call me on 07517 697569.

MY DO's AND DONT'S...a reminder.

This is just a quick reminder of the things that I do and the things that I don't do. I am writing this again because I had a client the other day who wanted to fuck me and I had to let him down, plus it is nice to remind everyone what they can expect during an appointment.

Things I do/offer:

Credit / Debit Card. Yes, I can offer a credit card service but if you wish to pay by card you must pay in advance. Your card will be discreetly charged with a name that does not reference a massage service. You must have made at least one appointment previously in cash.  I do not accept card payments from first time clients.  I also accept bank payment transfers and PayPal.  This must be paid before you attend.

Discretion . I offer an extremely discreet service from luxury premises, in a very nice part of Gosforth. I expect my clients to be equally discreet when visiting and leaving.

Massage. I am trained masseur, offering full body, head massage, facial and reflexology if required. Many clients just come for the full body massage and a wank at the end, which is fine by me.

Rimming. I love to rim a clean arsehole and I think that I can claim to be famous for my technique. I can certainly say that 99% of my clients love me rimming their arse. I also love to be rimmed and for those who like to be a little submissive, being verbally abused as you eat my arsehole, is a favourite for many clients. 

Fingering, yes I love to finger clients and I love being gently fingered myself.

Piss Fun. My regulars know that this is my favourite kink, From being very small I have always enjoyed watching men piss and being pissed on is my kink. On my arsehole, in the mouth, over my cock and balls, the choice is yours. Sadly I cannot piss on you. For some reason I can't do it, sorry.

Domination and Role-play. I love to do role-play where I dominate you. I can be your boss or teacher or whatever. I do not however do rubber or leather. It is not my thing. To do leather and rubber properly you need to be into it and invest in all the gear and I am not and so have not. But normal role play where I abuse you verbally and make you rim my arse or suck my cock or I sit on your face and do breath control etc is fine. 

Underwear and Dressing up. I have tight underwear and jockstraps, so please ask in advance if that is your thing. Some guys like me to wear white pants while I massage them and they put their hand inside my tight pants to play with my arsehole and balls. I love this myself, so, if this is your thing , then let me know in advance so I can be dressed and ready. Similarly if you want me to wear a suit or whatever. 

Spanking/caning. I have a cane and happy to do spanking and yes I enjoy a gently spanking myself. Just let me know in advance. Many clients enjoy a little spanking during the massage or afterward in role-play.

Fucking. I tend to do the fucking. I sadly cannot be fucked because of an operation after a car accident several years ago,  But as already pointed out, I do enjoy a good fingering and a good rimming. Most of my clients want to be fucked if they are into penetration, so wanting to fuck me is rarely a big issue. I love my arsehole being teased however with a cock and having a cock wanked against my anus and even stretching my arsehole rim is fine. I love the sensation of hot spunk or piss on my arsehole, but deep penetration is sadly a no go.

Submissive. I have recently discovered that I do have a submissive streak and although I cannot be fucked, I enjoy giving oral and rimming and being spanked and pissed on and verbally abused. If you fancy calling me a dirty slut while I tongue your arsehole, then give me a call and we can work it into your massage appointment.

Toys, I have a selection of toys that I can use on you.

Oral. Yes I do oral without a condom because I cannot stand the taste of condoms. If you insist on a condom for oral I will do it at a push but would prefer to just give you a hand finish at the end of the massage. Similarly giving oral to me.

Couples. Yes I do see couples, straight and gay. I tend not to fuck the woman but happy to fuck the man if it is a M/F couple. I am happy to offer oral and fingers to women and can fuck, but make no promises to do so. If the scenario is right, then I can sometimes oblige.

Women. Yes I do see single women and offer a full body massage with warm oil and happy to be naked if required and be touched etc. I offer oral and fingers etc to bring you to a climax but do not always manage to fuck a woman, but I have done so if the situation has aroused me. I am attracted to men, but I also enjoy bringing a woman to orgasm using my fingers and tongue. Warm oil and deft fingers can make for a very happy massage in all the most intimate places.

Disabled. Yes I do see disabled clients and my massage studio is wheelchair friendly as indeed is the wet room. I have no problems with entertaining disabled clients and have no issues if carers deliver and pick up. I offer a service which is open to everyone.

Kissing. provided you have no bad breath then I have no problem with kissing.

Telephone Sex.  I do offer a very successful wank-chat line where you can be as dirty as you like. I charge £1 per minute with a minimum £10 spend and you can carry left over minutes. For example, say you pay for 10 minutes and only use 5, then you will have 5 minutes left for another chat or perhaps to add onto another payment. Most clients seem to pay £20 for 20 minutes which they use over two or three calls, another guy paid £100 in advance and used his credit over two months. There are a number of discreet ways to pay.  I accept a top up code for 02, which you can get at any shop that has a Paypoint machine, Amazon Gift Card, PayPal or Bank Transfer.  My account is a discreet business account.

Age Limits. I  have no upper age limit, just make sure that you are over 18.

Thing that I do not do include:

Poppers. I do not sell poppers or take them, but have no objection if you bring your own for your own use.

Scat. I do not offer scat services under any circumstance.

Body Odour. The one thing that I cannot stand is a strong body odour. I know some guys love a sweaty smell and even like to lick armpits. Not me. A nice clean body, especially your cock, balls and arsehole please. Every one is required to shower in the wet room before a massage.

Cross Dressing. I have nothing against guys who like to cross dress in women's clothes and if its just a pair of knickers, that fine. Cross dressing however does nothing sexual for me and so I just do not offer that service. 

Group Sex. NO, only one to one or couples, m/m m/f.

Working with other Sex Workers. NO. I have done this in the past with unpleasant consequences so I offer only a one to one with personal clients. I live in a very exclusive area and have a nice home and offer my mainly married guys complete discretion and I want to keep it that way.

Drugs. Absolutely not.

Out-Calls. NO, I no longer travel to hotels or homes. I have a comfortable and discreet home with a designated massage suite and I am easy to find, just off the A1.

Fisting. NO, I do not offer fisting but happy to stretch your arsehole with fingers or dildo.

Underage Scenarios. NO. I am happy to be called daddy etc because that is a recognised gay fetish, but no pretending to be under-age please.

Video Call. No I do not offer video call. My business is built on discretion and I have been in business for 20 years, so I must be doing something right. Most guys wanting to do video call are really just wanting to check the goods before buying, Sorry my discretion is as important as the clients and besides I am not going to marry you. Your worse case scenario as a client is that you pay £60 for a half hour massage, my worse case scenario is my face or a video of myself being used nefariously. 

I think that I have covered most things, although I am sure I will have missed some things out and if I have missed out something that you may be interested in, then please just ask. I am open to most kinks, food kinks for example, where some guys like to lick cream off my arsehole for example or have their cock and balls covered in cake and for me to eat it off. Just let me know and I can normally accommodate whatever your desire is.

Telephone Chris on 07517 697569 to book a one to one massage appointment or just a wank-chat.

Hope you are all enjoying the blog. Keep nice and stiff and happy.

Chris.

A BELATED HAPPY NEW YEAR...

 A belated happy New Year to all my readers and clients old and new. December and January turned out to be very busy months with lots of new clients as well as my regular guys who called in to have a little fun and I hope left relaxed and happy. I am here to please and do my very best to make sure that every appointment is extra special, of course I may not always succeed, but I do do my best and since the majority of my clients return again and again, then I must be doing something right.

This is a funny old business where so much depends on chemistry, that is some form of connection being made between myself and my client. Trust is important and communication; but even more important is that something which makes an appointment extra special as opposed to being just good or worse, never again, which I hope is a rare occurrence. What that something is I have no idea, but I suppose it is about finding what the client really wants and turning a fantasy into a reality. Sometimes however things do not work out as expected. A good example is my meeting three wank chat clients in person over the Christmas period. Two of the appointments went brilliantly and a great time was had. One client however arrived, started the appointment and then got cold feet and apologising asked to leave. I think in twenty years I have had at most five clients who could not go through with an appointment so I was a little shocked. I guess it proves that fantasy is very different from reality and since most of my clients identify as straight, nervousness over the reality of actually sucking a cock proved overpowering. Who knows what goes on in peoples minds. sometimes I with that I could mind read because it would make my job much easier.

It is worth remembering that even though I have been in this business for almost 20 years, that I am just as nervous as many of my client on the first booking because obviously I have no idea what the client expects, likes or how adventurous they want to be. I do not think many clients themselves know until they arrive and then things happen and are either enjoyable or not. I had a client once who joked what an easy and enviable job I had, having sex all day. I asked him if he could genuinely be charming and welcoming to a gorgeous fit 20 year old, which for most would be easy, but then be equally welcoming to an overweight 50 year old and then an 80 year old man or perhaps a client in a wheelchair? I think it then dawned on him that there are skills required to this job that he had not thought about and indeed which many people who come into this business do not think about either. You have to show equal respect and passion for every gentleman who turns up, regardless of their age, social background, or physical attractiveness. 

Before I recall a couple of my more memorable appointments over the holiday season: can I ask everyone who is or who intends becoming a client to store my telephone No because I have a feeling that there could be issues raised over the looming online protection bill that could see websites and blogs being closed and they do this without notification. I recently had my twitter account pulled with no reason given and no right of appeal. I am very careful not to publish anything that goes against their rules, but anyone working in this industry sadly gets used to being periodically targeted and closed down for no reason. I immediately started a new twitter account which is up and running and so far without problems, but you never know. So I urge everyone to store my telephone number discreetly, which I know my regulars do already.  My number, as always is 07517 697569 and my Twitter ID is @newcgaymassage1

I have discovered a deliciously obscene sex position which my clients seem to love. It began when a regular client popped in for some fun which began, as always, with a back massage with warm oil. My hands soon began to stroke down the crack of his arse and around his balls and as he spread his legs I began to stroke his puckered arsehole. This client has an almost perfect arsehole, beautifully puckered and slightly raised so that when my tongue licked around his hole, it followed a perfect twitching, puckered, ring. It was not long before he raised his arse, allowing me to play with his dangling balls and to stroke his hard cock. Eventually, getting on all fours on the massage table, his arsehole level with my face, I was able to tongue fuck his hole which provocatively contracted in spasms around my tongue in response while I wanked his hard cock which was dribbling profuse amounts of pre-cum from the piss -hole. Eventually he slipped off the table and I was on my knees and and ready to receive a glorious face fuck. His thick shaft slid deep into my throat, making me gag, not that I complained, there is something in my sexual make-up that enjoys a little submissiveness and a mans thick cock rammed down my throat on this occasion had me rock hard and begging for more. The salty taste of his salty pre-cum was unbelievably erotic.

After a good face fuck and some more deep rimming as he bend over the massage table, we eventually moved through to the bedroom. I have a large mirror at the side of the bed where guys like to watch themselves being fucked or sucked or whatever. On this occasion I lay on the bed with my head over the edge and indicated at first that he should resume face fucking me, which he did. After a while he pulled out and I manoeuvred him so that his arse was above my face and he was facing the mirror. I told him to give me his arsehole and so squatting slightly over my face he lowered himself so that I was able to lick and suck and tongue fuck his arsehole while also running my tongue from his balls to his anus, which I greedily sucked and tongue fucked. I also took time to suck on his balls greedily taking both testicles into my mouth. Eventually he could stand no more of my mouth and tongue working their magic and squatting over my face so that my tongue was able to slide effortlessly in and out of his by now slightly gaping arsehole, I soon heard him moan loudly as wanking furiously he released a never ending jet of creamy spunk which splattered in thick globules of glistening spunk all over the mirror. 

Several of my clients, new and regulars have since ended their massage by assuming this position and have left happy chaps, de-spunked and ready to face the day.

Remember that if you cannot see me in person that you can book a dirty wank chat at £1 a minute with a minimum £10 spend and of course spare minutes can be carried forward. 

To book an appointment in person or a wank chat please give me a call on 07517 697569 and remember if you can to store the number. 

Happy wanking, but remember it is always nicer to have a willing mouth available.

Take care:

Chris 

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