Friday, 28 June 2013


In this job you meet all kinds of people and receive all kinds of requests. Some guys like to take things slow, have a massage, and then some sex, others are like whirlwinds.

On this particular occasion a guy I had seen several times arrived and was in a rush to get to a meeting. He quickly had a shower while I lay on the bed watching some porn and getting myself hard.

Out of the shower he was on top of me so that I could give his tight little arsehole a good licking out while he sucked on my hard cock. He has a puckered rim around his arsehole, and when you rim him you can feel the ridges with your tongue, and when he gets horny he opens just a little so that you can slip your tongue just inside his tight little hole. Quite delicious.

When I had him nice and wet he decided he wanted to sit on my cock so that he could ride me while I wanked him. His arse felt especially tight as he slipped his ring over my knob end. He slipped over my girth until I was buried ball deep inside his arse and he felt wonderfully tight. I thought I would explode to soon, but I held back somehow as he began to ride himself fast on my cock. His arse felt delicious as he slipped himself up and down my cock length, almost slipping my cock out of his arse, but not quite.

I however wanted to be in charge, and to give his arse a good pounding, so I indicated that he assume a doggy position with his face flat on the bed. This allowed me to penetrate his arsehole deep. I set to work using long, hard, but slow strokes. While I was fucking him I felt his hand move between our legs and as I fucked him he began to pull gently on my balls. This sent the most wonderful sensations running to the tip of my cock.
"Tickle my arsehole," I whispered.
He did more that that. As I fucked him he slipped a finger inside my arse ring and began to frig me while I fucked him. It was not long after he started frigging me that I shot my full ball load deep into his tight little arse.

As I was pumping my load into him he squeezed my balls again, almost squeezing the spunk out. I can still feel the delicious sensations that he gave me when he was doing this.

He then slipped off my cock and rolling over I took his rock hard cock into my mouth and sucked him off. He exploded seconds later with his cock in my mouth and two of my fingers inserted deep in his arsehole.

He left a very happy chap, and this all took exactly twenty minutes. Fast but furious fucking can sometimes be the best.

Keep hard.



Recovered from my adventures in York. I hate to say this but Edinburgh wins in the dirty, horny, sexy, stakes. It seems that the further south you go the less horny, less dirtier and more dull the guys become. Not to say that York was a waste of time. I met one very sexy guy with a big cock and a pair of big balls. He told me he was not into kinky and yet he sat on my face while I licked his arse out and sucked on his big balls. He rammed his thick cock down the back of my throat so that he was able to throat fuck me.....He gave by far the best, deliciously dirty sex, just the way I like it, and when he splashed his spunk into my mouth he tasted delicious. He alone would make another visit to York worthwhile. Getting hard just thinking about him.

So my next travels will be back to Edinburgh, probably toward the end of July. I may look at London as well, but that may be August now. I have to take care of my regulars here in Newcastle.

Talking of regulars I had a return visit from someone I saw two years ago. Nice guy, nice big cock. I lay on my back on my bed so that he could slip his cock right down the back of my throat. I am becoming quite an expert at this particular style of deep throat. The guys seem to love it. It tastes so nice when I feel their knob end hitting against the back of my throat, and sometimes I swallow into my throat, like a sword swallower. I admit that I need a little more practice in this art, so any clients with long thick cocks, please give me a call.

I have also been busy writing my new erotic novel. All you guys who claimed they were afraid to download, "My Dirty Memoirs," because their wives would see it, and think it was too gay, need not be afraid with this one. This is an historical novel that just happens to be raunchy, with lots of sex, dirty hot sex, with women and men and basically anything that moves. Lots of gore as well, that reflects those especially violent times. I hope that everyone will like it. I am certainly enjoying writing it.

I am off to entertain now, and then some more writing. Edinburgh guys, please book early for July. I missed lots of guys last time because it was such a short and hectic visit. This time hope to meet lots more chaps and have an even dirtier time than last time.

I am also booking an apartment this time, which will make things more discreet. Prices will be fifty for half an hour, seventy for an hour and quickies at thirty.

Take care and keep those cocks nice and hard...


Sunday, 23 June 2013

Writing the, "Depraved Memoirs of a Manservant"....

Another quiet Sunday. Not that I am complaining. It has been a busy week so nice to spend the day packing for my York trip tomorrow and writing.

First reminders about my York trip. I am available tomorrow, 24th June, from around 2.30ish pm until late, all day on the 25th and early morning on the 26th. I am based near the station and there is public parking very close if you require it. I am bringing oil, lube and some toys, so hopefully I will be able to meet most requirements. I am always nervous when going somewhere new and excited. Hopefully York will be as friendly and as exciting as my last visit to Edinburgh. I am looking forward to meeting some dirty minded guys who like nothing better than to get their arses rimmed and their cocks sucked. I am always happy to fuck a nice arse and happy to we hosed down with lots of hot piss. Yep, I like it dirty, (but clean arseholes and cocks please) as fans of this blog know.

Secondly I have started writing my second erotic novel. Not my second dirty memoirs, not yet. Instead this is an historical, erotic novel, every bit as dirty as, "My Dirty Memoirs," but this time set in sixteenth century Romania and Transylvania.
These stories are the memoirs of a young man who finds work at the castle of a lusty Count who is both bad  and cruel in every perverse way imaginable.The count likes sex, a lot, and he fucks men and women, taking pleasure in every perverse and depraved manner he is able. Our Young hero soon falls prey to the Count's lust's and unwillingly becomes both his manservant and companion and sexual toy.

This particular period was one of the most violent in history. It was a time when life was cheap and ordinary people were serfs, owned body and soul by the aristocracy. Witch hunts, burning alive, impaling and other unbelievably cruel tortures were used daily by the church and aristocracy to instil fear. It was a time of religious wars and persecutions. Protestants against Catholics and Christian against Muslim Turks . The hideous cruelty and depravity of the time provides a rich backdrop for our depraved tale of lust.

I have already written chapter one and I was hard and dripping by page three and had to stop.....HMMM

Will keep writing and hopefully it will not be too long before you will be able to read these scandalous tales.

Sunday, 16 June 2013


Fans of my book "My Dirty Memoirs," will know that the occasional outdoor fuck has been a little passion of mine. Got to be the right place and discreet of course.

I was once called to a farm to visit a regular client. He wanted some piss fun and a good fuck. Sounded fine to me. When I arrived, expecting to be taken into the farmhouse, I was instead whisked off to the distant corner of a corn field.

He, a big burly guy stripped his overalls off so that he was left wearing just a checked shirt and his boots. On all fours he spread his arse cheeks to give me a good view of his puckered mancunt. I was on all fours in seconds lapping at his puckered hole. 

I had drank loads of water on the drive up in preparation and so despite being rock hard I was dying for a piss. Standing in a filed of corn, stark naked, I let loose a stream of steaming hot piss, using his arsehole as the target. I soaked his arsehole and balls and back in piss. It was a horny sight, watching my hot piss hit his hole and watching how his arsehole winked at me, as thought trying to gobble some of the piss that hit it direct in its eye. 

When I had finished I had to taste my own piss of course and was straight down onto his puckered hole, eating it, licking and biting away until he was thrusting his mancunt hard onto my face.

Rock hard I then presented my cock end to his arsehole and mounting him like a dog mounting a bitch I watched my cock slide ball deep into his piss lubed arsehole. I fucked him hard until I felt I was near coming and then I pulled out and indicated that we change positions. This time I was on my back and it was his turn to piss on me. He knelt over me and pissed straight into my mouth while I wanked off . As I shot my load he moved his position slightly so that he could piss onto my shooting cock end. If you have never had this done then you are missing a treat. The hot piss meeting your hot spunk as it pumps out of your knobend is a memorable experience.

When he had finished pissing he finished himself of by hand as I fingered his hot sloppy arsehole. He shot his load as I was sucking on his knob end. Gallons of hot spunk followed his hot piss down my throat. 

I was drenched in piss, as was he, and my mouth was full of hot salty cum but....I was happy.

And I got paid. I love my job.


Sundays are quiet days usually. On the plus side it has given me an opportunity to organise for my trip to York.
I have booked a hotel as promised near the station, which is easy to find, discreet, and near to a pay and display car park.

I will be available for an appointment from 2 pm on Monday 24th. I am charging £50 for a half hour and £70 for an hour and I will do quickies at £30.

The half hour and hour+ appointments will include, if you wish, massage and of course a happy ending. Anyone who is a fan of this blog will know that my idea of a happy ending can mean anything from a wank, a blowjob, a good fingering naturally is included. I also fuck, (top only) and suck and rim and of course if you are the man for the job I love nothing better than a good hose down with some hot man piss.
And of course I do" cum in mouth"...what a waste otherwise.

After my recent visit to Edinburgh you guys in York have some serious competition to beat so I hope you are up to the job...only teasing.

I welcome all kinds of guys. Most of the men I see are married guys looking for a bit of discreet dirty fun, which is ideal for me. I see all ages from young inexperienced virgins to older guys wanting a chat and a fumble....All are welcome and hopefully will leave with a smile.

I can do longer appointments if wanted and happy to visit city centre hotels if that is easier for guys staying in the centre of York.

Hopefully the weather will be nice and I will get a chance to go exploring. If not, I am sure I will have plenty of cock to keep me happy which will give me lots of dirty stories to tell on this blog and in my next dirty book.

So please book early to avoid disappointment.


Thursday, 13 June 2013


For my many readers who think that all I ever think about and talk about is sex, then the fact that I also write more seriously on other subject's, may come as a surprise.

My ambition is to be a serious writer one day. Who knows if I will ever achieve that dream. I suppose that it will all depend on how good I am as a writer and of course if readers like and buy my work.

My first "serious" book is a collection of short stories inspired by my interest in everything Gothic or Pagan. I love ghost stories and things that go bump in the night. I love observing people and writing about those observations. I like looking at ideas such as being in love and what falling in love really means and of course about the hugely diverse nature of human sex and sexuality.

My new book is called "Shadow's and Reflection's" and you can BUY IT HERE for your kindle from Amazon. No, these stories will not have you hard and excited, but hopefully you will enjoy them and they will make you think and reflect. These stories illustrate that I can be serious, humorous, sensual, and reflective.

Again I would love feed back and for anyone who reads this book and who enjoyed it I you would be delighted if you would leave a review.

Please note that I write fiction under my pseudonym of Christopher Turney.

Wednesday, 12 June 2013


Remember "My Dirty Memoirs," is now available to download onto Kindle for your entertainment. If you are looking for something to keep you, "UP," all night, then this is the book you have been looking for. Filled with the lusty and often quite disgusting, recollections of my early adventures fucking on the farm with farm lads, huntsmen and rugby players, and then everything I got upto at college, this book lives up to its title as a, "dirty," book, in fact it is filthy, so please do not be shy.  Treat yourselves to a very dirty read. It has already had one five star review, but I am sure you will give it many more.

All the guys coming forward to see me in York, and Edinburgh, and Bath, should perhaps treat themselves to this book. It will be just a little taster of what you can expect when you visit me.

Competitively priced at £2.99, you can't complain, and I promise that you will not be disappointed. Already working on the next lot of adventures.


Monday, 10 June 2013

I have been so pleased with the response to my visit to York on the 24th and 25th/26th of June. I think I will require lots of  extra stamina to keep up with the horny guys of Yorkshire who are promising to give me lots of cock during my visit.

I cant wait. I love York, all those little dark alley ways to explore. I hope however that I will be viewing, and licking, and probing the dark alleys of the gentlemen of York, and have little time to visit the mediaeval sites. I know which I will find more enjoyable. I will of course also be available to visit gentlemen in centrally located hotels if they wish.

Fans of this blog will know all my little kinks, the dirty things that I like to write about on this blog. They know that I love a good clean arsehole to lick, a nice cock to suck, and some big balls to play with. I also love to ride a nice arse and everyone knows that my favourite, if your up for it, is a good hose down with some hot piss. Oh and of course I also offer the best massage in town, if you can keep your cocks under control for long enough, which once my fingers start probing is very unlikely.

So what have I been up to or rather into this week. The answer is one very nice virgin tight arsehole.

A youngish guy, early twenties turned up for a massage. He was only a few minutes on the table and I had his arse cheeks spread and my tongue was lapping at his tight puckered mancunt.

He was a virgin but desperate for some arse probing. I slipped my finger into his tight wrinkled hole which was well lubed with my saliva and he winced slightly. I could feel his arse ring grip my finger. He had one of those long entry tubes which are a delight to fuck because they grip your shaft as you slide in an out.
He was fucking tight however.

We eventually, after some good fingering, made our way into the bedroom, where on his knees, on the bed, I was able to spread his arse cheeks and to lube him ready to present my cock. He was so fucking tight it took me three attempts to push my knob end into his hole. I slipped in eventually however and then stopped while he accustomed himself to my cock inside him. I then pushed on, sliding my cock slowly into his mancunt, until I was fully inserted ball deep. I could feel his arse ring gripping my shaft, which sent delightful  sensations deep into my balls.

He whimpered like a bitch, but as he became accustomed to the strange sensation, and my cock hit that spot, he began to slide himself on and off my cock so that I was eventually fucking him hard, forcing my cock ball deep with each stroke, which he met eagerly, pushing his arse back to meet my thrusts.

It only took a few strokes before I heard him grunt and he unloaded his balls all over the bed sheet. It was glistening in spunk. I could feel myself also nearing the moment of no return, and I gripped him tight as I fucked him hard before withdrawing my cock and shooting my load over his arsehole and cheeks.

I was still so fucking horny even after I had come, and he was still rock hard as he lay with his arse in the air covered in my cream. Naturally I was soon down on all fours and could not resist licking some of my own ball cream off his arse, and all the time I was watching his juicy wrinkled  arsehole winking at me as though to say thanks for the visit.

Yep I am a dirty bastard, but then that is why you love me and return again and again.

Sunday, 9 June 2013


After all the excitement of Edinburgh I have decided to visit York. I am arriving on the 24th so will be available all afternoon and evening of the 24th, all day on the 25th and possibly early morning on the 26th of June in a luxury central location in York.

I hope that the guys in York do not disappoint. I am expecting them to at least to do better than the Edinburgh guys in horniness. I expect lots of nice Yorkshire arseholes to lick, balls and cocks to suck and if I am lucky some hot wet piss fun for which I am gaining an enviable reputation.

Of course I will be offering a more gentle massage and happy ending, either a wank or oral to completion for those who like their fun less raunchy. It is your choice.

The last few days have been lots of fun. The studio has been busy.

I saw one fabulous guy with a thick long cock and a wonderfully ridged arsehole which was a delight to rim. He knelt over my face to allow me to rim him while he lent forward and sucked on my cock and fingered my arsehole. He was obviously experienced with using his fingers and he had me rock hard as he slipped his fingers in and out of my arsehole in time to his sucking of my cock.

After I had given his arsehole a good licking he moved slightly back so that he was able to push his stiff cock into my mouth so that his knob end was rubbing the back of my throat.  I was gagging but boy it felt good.

His balls were all the time bouncing off my nose end as I swallowed his thick cock in and out of my throat. Temptation was of course too much and eventually I slipped my finger into his saliva lubed arsehole and began to frigg him which soon had him ready to shoot. The sensation of his cock throbbing in my mouth as he gushed a torrent of hot cream into my throat was amazing and just thinking about it is making me hard again.

So gentleman of York I expect lots of hot man cream delivered from big juicy balls. Remember shy boys get no cocks and just wank a lot.....but I digress.

I am offering my services for £50 half hour and £70 for the hour and I am prepared to do quickies for £30. I always do my best to keep the prices competitive and affordable and of course offer a service that is memorable which is why my clients return again and again again.

Please book early for my York adventure to avoid disappointment and look forward to meeting lots of nice chaps in York.

After York I am heading back to Edinburgh so please Edinburgh guys book early and will see you at the end of the month in a luxury location in Edinburgh.

After Edinburgh I am thinking of visiting Bath. So gentleman of Bath I hope you are standing to attention when I arrive :-)

Wednesday, 5 June 2013


I keep getting asked if I give a student discount. I have said no because I charge very competitive rates.

What I have decided to do however is to offer a £30 massage rate for 45 min but only for genuine students with proof of ID.

 Please bring ID with you.

Chris :)


Well Edinburgh was as expected wonderful. I met some very nice gentlemen who did Scotland proud. Only one treated me to my own special little kinky need, a good piss shower, but he did it not once but twice and then I sucked him off in the shower and he delivered a very nice load of hot spunk into my mouth.

I rimmed some very nice arseholes and was sucked very nicely by one gentleman who was quite a hunk. So despite it being a flying visit and having very limited hours on the first day I think I managed to live up to my blog reputation. I also of course gave some very nice massages which of course always ended up with one special type of massage...yep you know what I am talking about.

So I am planning another visit in a few weeks time. This time I will either book a much better hotel or an apartment. If anyone has any ideas please don't be shy. Somewhere nice and quiet of course and discreet but a little luxurious without being too expensive. I will try to keep the price competitive so that everyone is happy.

And was the weather not glorious. I had lunch twice in a very nice veggie restaurant and sat eating ice cream in Princes street gardens in the sunshine.

Do remember that I am also available for longer appointments, (or quickies) just ask. I hope to meed a nice groups of regular chaps in Edinburgh to compliment my lovely friends in Newcastle, who when they get to know me well have become more adventurous with familiarity...and I can be very familiar when I have my tongue up your arse and hopefully your finger up mine...but I digress into smut again and again and again...

I will let everyone know in advance when I next intend to visit. Please stay in touch and of course I am around all of June in Newcastle at the studio ready to entertain.

I could become quite used to this touring. If anyone would like to meet me anywhere in the country I will give it consideration.

Keep it up and hard,

Chris. :_)