Wednesday, 27 July 2016

Apologies And A New Dirty real Life Encounter With One Of My Regular Married Gentlemen Remembered.

It seems ages since I last wrote anything for the blog. My only excuse is that I have just been incredibly busy with work and loads of personal stuff. I nearly had a major disaster when my new laptop suddenly decided to die losing three books i have been working on over the last two years . Somehow and after three experts had attempted to access my files, I was able to retrieve the manuscripts, so I am still on course to hopefully get my next erotic novel published for Christmas.

In the meantime I have had lots of incredibly sexy encounters....

One of my regulars is also into my favourite kink, watersports. He is a good looking daddy type, with not a bad body and a nice cock and dangling balls which I love to suck, usually I try my best to take them both in my mouth, while he wanks his big cock over my face, but I, as usual, get ahead of myself and this particular encounter was a little different.

When he arrives he is always dying for a piss and this occasion was no exception. He arrived smiling and undressing he calls me, now also naked, into the shower. He smiles wickedly, "are you ready he asks," pointing his cock at my face. I lick my lips and he begins to piss, first with a few dribbles, which I lick from his knob-end, sucking the thick bulb into my mouth until suddenly a torrent of hot piss hits my tongue and quickly fills my mouth. He is one of those guys who is able to piss from a semi erect cock and as he pisses into my mouth I begin to suck his cock, taking his semi-erect thick, pissing cock deep into my throat as I use my fingers to pull gently on his heavy balls.  His piss is now flowing, hot, tasting slightly salty, into my mouth and then over my lips and running down my chest, falling onto my cock and balls. My cock is now rock hard of course and I rub his hot piss over my cock and over my balls. He watches what I am doing and pulling his still pissing cock from my mouth he directs his piss at my cock, giving it a good wash as I use his hot piss as lube, wanking my cock and pulling on my balls. I feel his piss running down my legs and under my balls and stretching my hand back I rub my arsehole with my fingers, using his warm piss as lube to tease myself.

I look up, his eyes are filled with lust and he nods his head, which is my signal to turn around and kneeling I bend over so that my head is touching the floor and my arse is sticking in the air. In this position I can pull my arse-cheeks apart and he can direct the last remaining stream of his hot piss directly onto my arsehole. The sensation of his piss directly hitting the centre of my arsehole is delicious and I encourage him by pushing my finger into my tight hole, using his piss as lube I frigg my own anus for a few minutes, slipping my finger deep inside while he watches.

At last I feel the last drops of his piss hit my arse cheeks and turning around onto my knees I again take his cock into my mouth and begin to suck greedily on his cock which is now rock hard and tasting of salty piss. I happily suck on his cock, sucking his thick shaft deep into may mouth until he eventually pulls his cock free  and indicates that I climb onto the massage table on my knees so that again my arse is up in the air. I feel his hands on the cheek of my arse and he pulls them apart so that he has access to my piss washed anus. I hear him purr before I feel the hotness of his tongue as he begins to rim me, pushing his tongue into my arsehole and then running his tongue around the puckered hole, before once gain tongue fucking me. While he is rimming me I am wanking my cock furiously, moaning with pleasure. I am enjoying his tongue so much that I am a little peeved when he stops and helping me from the table he takes my place and presents his arse for my view.

The sight before me is incredibly sexy, his round brown ring winking at me and his balls heavy and dangling, I can't resist taking them in my hand as my tongue begins to assault his arse-ring, running around his puckered hole, slipping into the ring, teasing him.  As I do so my hand slips from his heavy balls and grabbing hold of his thick cock I began to wank his shaft while licking his arsehole. I hear him moan with pleasure and rubbing my fingers over his cock end I feel the sticky pre-cum dribbling copiously from his piss hole. I felt that he was near, so ask him to lie flat on the massage table. He obliges as I take his cock deep into my mouth while my fingers, now slippery with warm oil, slip between his legs, rubbing and pulling his balls a little before locating his arsehole which I rub with gentle circular motions around the puckered rim before slipping my finger inside him. I then begin frigging his arsehole while deep throating him, feeling his knob end touching my tonsils, making me gag, but I carry on sucking him hard while frigging his arsehole, my finger now fully inserted. With a sudden jerk of his cock, deep in my throat and his anal ring gripping my finger I am rewarded with copious jets of ball cream drenching my tonsils, filling my mouth, forcing me to swallow his spunk, hot and warm and sticky. He shoots so hard and so much that I can't possibly swallow all of it and his thick spunk dribbles from my mouth and down over his balls. I look up, his knob still in my mouth as I suck every last drop of sperm, his eyes are rolling, "I m seeing fucking stars," he mutters and he looks down laughing as I finally release his cock from my mouth. I must look a sight `i realise, his cum dribbling down over my chin, thick and sticky.

So folks, as you see, I have been busy.

I you want to make an appointment call chris on 07517697569 and join my band of happy married gentlemen who like a safe, discreet but dirty sex encounter. M/F couples and single females also welcome.

Sensual dirty massage with a happy ending guaranteed.

Monday, 20 July 2015

NAUGHTY DADDY TYPES...are more fun

Life as an erotic masseur has its ups and downs; like any job, but usually there are more ups than downs and certainly plenty of hard erections to keep a horny guy like myself more than happy. I especially like the dirty daddy types, the type who are married, ordinary guys, with very dirty imaginations.

A couple of days ago, as an example, I opened the door to a new client, a mddle aged, tyically married guy, who greeted me with a smile and that twinkle in his eye that kind of lets me know that he would be up for a bit of dirty fun.

He showered and I noticed in the mrirror that he paid particular attention to soaping his arsehole; which made me smile, I love to rim a guy, but only if, like me, he is scrupulously clean in that area, know what I mean. He was still in good shape and had lovely pendulous bull balls; which swung as he walked. I admit, I am very much a ball pervy guy, my idea of heaven is to have a heavy pair of testicles bouncing on my face, seriously, that and being pissed on, are my two favourite kinks. But enough of my personal fantasies.

He hoped onto the table and as he did so I caught a glimpse of his round little arsehole, nicley puckered, just the way I like them. I began the massage as normal, with the warm oil slipping between his bottocks. As I massaged his bottocks, my fingers somehow, (intentionally,) stroked over his anus, rubbing the hot oil deep into his little tight hole, which of course made him moan gently and open his legs to allow me easier access. I knew, I told myself, you can always tell a perv and to be honest, I should know.

My regulars know that I rarely turn down an invitation to get my tongue up a willing arsehole and so, once he was nicely relaxed and excited, I had my head down and began running my tongue around his arsehole rim, all the time squeezing his balls very gently, they felt deliciously heavy in my hand.

His cock was now rock hard and I gave it a few stroked while I continued to rim his arse. He was dribbling pre-cum now and so we both agree that it was time that we made our way through to the bedroom, where he asked me to kneel on the bed, head down and arse cheeks spread. He was on his knees in seconds and was straight into my tight little hole with his tongue, rimming my arse like a professional. He soon had my cock dribling as his tongue stroked around my rim and then, when he slipped his finger inside me, I was in heaven, moaning like a bitch and wishing he would use two fingers and really stretch my arsehole, just the way I like it to be teased.

I realised before long that I was near coming, so, I indicated that if I lay on my back, he could sit on my face and let me retrun the plaesure he had just given me. His arse tasted delicious and when he pulled back I was able to begin to lick his balls, lovely heavy round orbs, that I sucked greedily into my mouth, making him moan with pleasure. He pullled back a little more and slipped his thick dribbling cock into my mouth and pushed it deep down my throat, at the same time taking my cock into his own mouth. Sucking my cock, while fingering my arsehole, while I sucked on his cock, which he thrust deep into my mouth, soon had us both near orgasm and when I slipped my finger into his tight spittle lubbed arsehole it was just to much and with a final thrust he slipped his jerking cock deep into my throat and began to cum, shooting jet after jet of salty spunk into my mouth and down my throat. Fuck, the sensation of hot spunk jetting into your mouth is just so erotic, i'm rock hard writing this and remembering the sensation, but I digress, I was now ready to cum myself and before he had finished jerking I squirted my own ball load, filling his mouth with my hot thick spunk. We both now had our mouths full of hot ball cream and we were both totally delighted. Laughing we mopped up the residue that was spilling down our chins.

He was delighted with my performance, I of course was more than happy, nothing like a dirty daddy type to make me hot and horny. I do hope he will become a regular. I need more daddy types looking for good, dirty and raunchy sex. Thats why I am a popular male masseur I presume..

call 07517 697569 to book an appointment, i'm usually around and willing to please.

Sunday, 15 March 2015


I have had, I am glad to say, my usual lust filled January and February. Some guys are just insatiable. Lots of lovely massage and rimming and fingering and fucking. No horny piss guys...where are you all hiding. My regular Piss guy who often managed three or four good piss showers in an hour has been missing for three months. I am sure he will be back, but i do miss his especially dirty fun appointments.

I have, however, in the meantime, become infamous for my prostate massage. One regular client recently shot his load of spunk so hard it nearly sprayed the ceiling, leaving the poor man quite dizzy and drained. He is an especially lovely guy with a nice body and a big cock and an arsehole you could rim for ever.

On his last visit we started as usual with a massage using warm oils, but very soon he had his arse in the air and my lips sucking on his tight puckered arsehole. His hole is deliciously puckered and you can't not want to dive in and taste it.

I began as usual by licking around his arsehole and then running my tongue down between his legs and then over his big hairless, heavy balls. I like to suck them individually into my mouth before trying, unsuccessfully, to get them both into my mouth at the same time. I then like to pull his big thick cock back between his legs and to lick around the glands, sliding half his knob into my mouth to see how much I can take down my throat. All the time I am doing this I like to rub my fingers around his saliva lubed arsehole and when I get his cock deep into my throat I slip a finger into his arsehole and and he moans loudly as i continue to suck on his cock and frig his arse with my finger at the same time.

Releasing his cock from my mouth I continue to finger fuck his arsehole, probing deeper and deeper into his anus until I find that little hot button, his prostrate. When I have stroked his prostrate for a short time and he his moaning and groaning with pleasure I ask him to turn around. lying on his back I am able to begin to deep throat his cock, taking it deep into the back of my throat until I almost gag and have to come up for air, then, pouring hop oil onto the end of his knob, which makes his moan even more and provides even more lubrication which allows my hand and then my mouth, alternatively, to slide over his cock shaft and around his knob end. This brings him close to climax and he has to indicate for me to slow down.

I then give him a little rest while I lube my fingers with gel and then I begin to probe his anus again, pushing one and then two fingers into his arsehole, again searching for that magic button. By now his legs have spread wide open and  I am alternatively sucking his cock and then his balls while I wank his cock with my oiled hand. I am all the time massaging his prostrate, my fingers deep inside his arsehole and he is moaning and groaning with pleasure.

I like bringing him to near climax and then slowing things down, over and over and over again. While I am dong this he likes to play with my cock and balls and better still he likes to frig my arsehole, pushing one and then two fingers deep into my anus while I work on his cock.

On his last visit, without notice, while I was pleasuring his anus and prostrate with my fingers, he let out a deep moan as, unable to resist the sensation of his prostrate being massaged and his balls being licked while I wanked his cock, he ejaculated in strong spasms, jet after jet of spunk that shot straight toward the ceiling. I admit I was a little pissed off because normally he shoots his heavy thick load of sweet tasking spunk down my throat, but I forgave him because it was just amazing seeing the look on his face as the spunk jetted out of his piss hole, covering my hair and chest and even landing on his and my face.

When he had finished he lay exhausted, his fingers still buried deep in my arse. I slipped my fingers from his arsehole gently and laughing pulled his fingers out of mine before handing this a towel to clean himself. He was a very happy gentleman and is one of my favourite clients for very obvious reasons. If only I could persuade him to try a little watersports....If he is reading this and no doubt smiling, perhaps next time?

A little good news i that I have more availability this month but I am off over Easter.
Have fun and don't be good...its very dull.


Monday, 5 January 2015


At last I am pleased to announce that I have more availability. I am going to be around the house for the next few weeks, so if you fancy a dirty massage experience please call : 07517 697569 to make an appointment.

Anyone who reads this blog knows that being shy will not get you rimmed, sucked and fucked, or, for the adventurous, the chance to piss on a real lover of water sports, (thats not the kind that involves sailing, scuba diving or swimming). 

I am also a trained masseur, for those clients who prefer a long, deep, massage using warm oils with a happy ending in discreet, luxury, surroundings, then I am definitely recommended.
Obviously all gentlemen are welcome. The vast majority of my clients are married gentlemen and many are looking for a first time experience, so don't think that you have to be adventurous if you do not want to be, or are simply nervous. The massage experience is very relaxed and very laid back.
I am also happy to see couples. M/M or M/F. I also see females looking for a sensual massage experience, although I prefer women to be with partners. 



£65 FOR 45 MINUTES, 

£80 FOR AN HOUR.  




I also offer a domination service for those who like to spanked or caned. 
Please call for details. I

f you fancy just a phone wank please call my dedicated 

WANK LINE 07053 509694 

Please note that anyone expecting to get a free wank by calling the massage line will be rejected, so please don't bother even trying. The dedicated wank line is not expensive and you can be as dirty as your imagination allows you.

I think you will agree that I cover almost all your possible erotic/fantasy requirements, but briefly what I don't offer are the following:

I do not cross dress.

I do not have leather or rubber.

I only do rimming/fingering (which I really enjoy) if you have showered in the studio before beginning the appointment. Cleanliness is essential for my health and for yours.

Please note, I am not a gay scene skinny twink. I am a mature male, good looking, with a goatee beard and I have been told a nice body. I am straight looking/acting. If you want an effeminate boyish sort, I am definitely not your type.

Hope to see you soon.

Chris xxx

Thursday, 1 January 2015


I promised that I would recall one of the best pre christmas appointments.  A couple of days before Christmas Eve A new client booked an appointment. I was I admit a little tired so was not feeling especially horny. I was in truth not looking forward to the appointment. That all changed when I opened the door to a hunky bearded guy. You know that feeling you get when you guess that you you are in the company of a possible pervert, in the nicest way of course. I was not to be disappointed.

As usual we began on the massage table. He was a chunky guy in the nicest way. I don't mean fat, or over muscle bound, just thick set, with a very defined bubble butt that was a pure joy to massage. You know how dirty minded I am, so how could I resist not letting my fingers delve down between his arse cheeks so that I was able to stroke his pouting arsehole rim. I knew that I just had to get  my tongue in there and as you may have guessed it was not long before my tongue was stroking around the rim of his arsehole and licking down between his legs toward his balls.

My own cock was now rock hard and as I bent over to get my tongue wedged further up his now twitching arsehole he slipped a finger into mine. I was so fucking horny that I began to fuck myself on his finger, all the time licking deep and deeper into his arsehole. He was getting very excited and pushed himself onto his knees which allowed me to grab his thick cock which I began to wank up and down, all the time continuing to lick around his puckered hole before running my tongue down to his big gorgeous heavy hairless balls, just the kind that I like to suck into my mouth and roll around with my tongue. I whispered, reluctantly dropping his balls from my mouth, "do you want to go into the bedroom?" He nodded in agreement.

As he dropped down from the massage table I got a full birds-eye view of his arsehole and balls dangling, wet with my saliva. I could not resist dropping onto my knees and as he still had one leg on the massage table I now had total access to his balls and round, moist, puckered anus. I began to pull gently on his balls while I again sucked on and licked around his arsehole-rim. I didn't know exactly if I wanted to fuck him or if I wanted something special. What can I say other than that great dirty minds think alike. He turned around, presenting his thick dribbling erection which I slipped into my mouth and I began to deep throat, taking his thick, juicy knob deep into my throat so that I nearly choked, but I didn't care. After several strokes down my throat I pulled his cock out and ran my tongue around his swollen glands, "piss on me then" I whispered. He smiled a wicked smile and began to concentrate. It is not easy pissing when you are rock hard, few guys can do it. All I can say is that this chap managed it beautifully as he released a jet of clear salty piss which arced out of his piss hole and over my face and yes into my mouth. I could not resist the temptation and slipped his still hard and pissing cock into my mouth, yummy, the feeling of hot piss filling your mouth as you suck on a thick cock is like nothing else. If you have never had the pleasure then you really have not lived. I could feel his cock grow even harder and withdrawing his cock it was obvious that even he was now too excited to carry on pissing. I however, had to have more cock and once more took his cock deep into my mouth and encouraged him to face fuck me quite roughly, yet also gently. His cock began to twitch in my mouth so that i thought he was a bout to spurt. Instead he indicated that I stand and turn so that he could bend me over, exposing my arsehole. He rubbed his wet knob end against my hole, teasing me so that I wanted to be fucked, but instead of inserting his cock he began to finger me, using two fingers, stretching my tight hole. I was now in total sex heaven and I needed some hot salty spunk in my mouth.

I pulled away and again went down onto my knees and grabbing his cock began to roll my tongue around his knob end while wanking his thick shaft. It was not long before I was rewarded with jet after jet of hot salty spunk shooting from his jerking cock straight into my mouth, onto my tongue, over my face, over my chin so that I was covered with his creamy gooey spunk.

I love dirty minded guys who really let themselves go and this guy was one such guy. I still felt tired but I admit that I had a wank after he let. Well to be honest wouldn't you.

Chris xx

Monday, 29 December 2014

Looking forward To 2015

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas because I certainly did. Thank you so much to those clients who tipped or bought a little present. It is nice to be appreciated. I also have to apologise for having limited availability. I am only one person and as many of my clients know I have other business interests and they took up lots of my time.

I am however availible most days until the 5th of January.

I have of course continued to be as raunchy as always. Lots of nice hard cock to suck on, arseholes to rim and some very bad boys who indulged me in my favourit kink, pissing. getting hard just thinking about one gentleman in particular. I shall write about that little encounter in my next post.

I have sadly had to increse my prices. I now charge £50 for half an hour, £65 for 45 minutes and £80 for the hour. Anyone who has ever booked me know that those prices are still good value considering how rude and dirty I am, as well of course being a very good masseur.

I am also still writing my second "My Dirty Memoirs" the first is still availible on kindle, please treat yourselves and leave a review. I am also still writing my historic erotica, which should have been available for Christmas, but sadly I did not finish in time.

I am also considering doing short stories for Kindle, based on my adventures, which you can download for 99p or some other low price. I would be able to write those quicker, and I know that  my dirty minded readers are dribling in anticipation, if you get my meaning.

I will sign off and wish everyone a happy New Year and I will post another erotic recollection this week for your pleasure and to wet your appetite either for an appointment or for the next kindle book.

Chris xxx

Saturday, 30 August 2014


My new domination site is ready. You can view it  HERE It is simple and easy to navigate and an ideal launching spot for my new anthology of erotic short stories which will be published soon and available to download onto your kindle.

If you cant wait to read the book, you can of course ring and speak to me in person on my new wank line. Be as dirty as you want. The wank line No is 07053 580510

Obviously the new service is for those guys looking for role play and perhaps a little spanking, caning fun. My regulars clients will know that this will include, if required, all the dirty sex you can think of.

Domination is of course not a new venture for me. I have clients who have enjoyed exploring their submissive side over many years. Which reminds me of one particular incident, from a few years ago:

I was called to a guys house with his instructions that he wanted to be verbally humiliated, his pants taken down, put across my knee and spanked.

He is a guy in his late thirties, reasonably toned. When I arrived he was dressed in jeans and a t shirt. My instructions was that I was to play the role of his boss who had discovered that he had been rude to a valued customer.

I fell straight into the role. I told him that he was a "fucking disgrace" and "an embarrassment, who deserved to have his bare arse tanned."
" He begged forgiveness, stating that he would never do anything like this again."
I of course was having none of it.

Taking a seat on a suitable chair, I told him to stand in front of me and unbuckle his belt and pull his pants down. He did as he was instructed, turning red, as he unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them down a little.
I pulled him toward me and roughly pulled his jeans down to his ankles before telling him to remove them completely. This left him standing in his little cotton briefs and t shirt.
I noticed that he already had a good bulge showing in his briefs. He was already semi erect, and getting harder I was pleased to note, even though I had not yet touched his cock.

I pulled him across my knee and pulled his pants down over his arse cheeks, revealing his bubble butt. I stroked his arse cheeks roughly, squeezing them, my hand slipping between his legs, so that I could feel his firm balls through the thin cotton of his pants. I couldn't resist squeezing  his cock, which I was pleased to note was now  rock hard.

Suddenly I brought my hand down hard on his buttocks. It was a hard slap, that left a red mark on his soft arse cheeks. He moaned and wriggled on my knee. I could feel his hard cock rubbing against my leg, as I continued to tan his arse cheeks with my bare hand.

All the time I was spanking him, I was telling him what a fucking disgrace he was, and that he was a dirty bastard, getting so hard and turned on by my spanking him.
"He should be sorry for his mistake, not humping my fucking leg, while I spanked his arse cheeks." I reprimanded him.

After twelve of the best with my hand across his bare arse I allowed him to stand. He was red in the face, but his cock betrayed how truly excited he was. It stood out a good seven inches, forming a tent in his little pants which still, almost, covered his erection. I noticed the cotton was wet with pre cum.

I slapped his bare arse again, as he stood, trying to avoid my slaps. I had hold of him by his pants however which I now pulled off completely.

His cock was thick I noted and a stream of pre cum oozed out of his piss hole. I took his thick cock in my hand and squeezed it hard, while with my other hand, forced between his legs from the back, I grabbed his balls, squeezing them gently while stroking his cock.
"What the fuck is this," Noting how his cock jerked in my hand, his knob end becoming more moist with every stroke.
"I'm sorry sir," he whimpered.
"You dirty cunt," I yelled at him. "Look, you have got me fucking hard now," I chastised him, as I released him and standing I pulled out my own rock hard cock.
"What you going to fucking do about this then," I demanded.
"I don't know sir," He whimpered.
"On your fucking knees."I demanded as I removed my own trousers and briefs, so that I now wore only my socks, shirt, tie, and suit jacket.
He obeyed and I stood over him, stroking my cock.
"Take it in your fucking mouth, you dirty fucking cunt."
He opened his mouth and I shoved my cock in, forcing it deep down his throat. He began to suck me, using his tongue to lick up and down the shaft, before licking around my balls.
All the time he was sucking my cock I continued to verbally abuse him.

"Show me your arse cheeks." I demanded. He swung around on his keens and putting his head near the ground he presented his arse to my view, pulling his cheeks apart, allowing me a view of his arsehole. It was shaved, the hole itself a puckered circle that just demanded to be fucked.

I once more to slapped his arse cheeks as he squirmed on the floor beneath me. Again and again I slapped him with my hand until his arse cheeks were red. It was his puckered arsehole however kept capturing my attention.

To cut a long story very short, it was not long before I was shoving my thick cock into his tight little arse ring. It was a pure joy to watch my knob end disappear, almost sucked, into that welcoming hole. I remember he was fucking tight. A virgin arse he assured me.
Despite his virginity, he took my cock deep inside his man cunt. I fucked him with long hard strokes, pulling nearly out, before plunging back ball deep once more. I was fucking him like a stallion, and to be honest, although its a great fuck position, especially if your doing a show fuck, it also kills the legs.
I was near shooting my ball load anyway, so pulling out of his arse I told him to get on his knees and to open his mouth. Standing over him once more I told him to lick my balls while I wanked myself off, His tongue was warm and wet around my balls, which he tried to suck individually and together, into his mouth. It was not long before I was ejaculating my ball cream, his tongue slithering over my knob end so that every last drop of spunk was caught and swallowed

Now, how, I thought, was I going to bring this dirty bastard off. Then it occurred to me.
"Lie down, you fucking dirty cunt." I demanded.
He lay down on the floor and I squatted over his face, presenting my arsehole to his tongue. He began to lick my arshole. pushing his greedy tongue deep into my arse ring while he wanked himself off. It was not long before he let out a long muffled groan and ejaculated jet after jet of hot spunk over his T shirt. I remember that a warm spray hit my dangling balls.

That was a few years ago. I've seen this chap several times since then. He is one of my dirtiest clients and I am sure he will recognise himself in this retelling of a very horny encounter. He is probably, like me having a wank over the memory.